ANS jokes

I just took an orange soda bath this morning. The next thing I knew, it turned out to be a river of Orange Crush.

Why do orphans not like the movie Frozen?

Because for them, love isn't an open door.

John Wilkes Booth, to his fiancee: "I have an important role to play tonight at Ford's Theater."

Fiancee: "Break a leg!"

Hey y'all, you want to read something funny? Then look up "Greater Tuna" OID and read the script. It's the best. I'm performing it for an OID (Oral Interpretation of Drama) and it kicks ass. Check it out. Also, the name I'm using is my Roblox Username. Friend me.

What is black, white, and red all over? An interracial abort!

Teacher: We have a new student. He's an orphan.

Student: Oof.

Teacher: Is anyone missing?

Student: His parents.

An alligator is in a class, turns out he likes teaching!

The orphan had to earn money because he/she didn't have parents to give him/her an allowance.

When you're angry, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

My friend thinks he is funny.

He told me that the only food that makes you cry is an onion, so I threw a coconut at him.

Jimmy asks an elevator operator what he thinks of his job.

The operator shrugs and says, "It has its ups and downs!"

If your kid beats up an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?

I accidentally hit an orphan with my car, but I was not worried because he couldn’t tell his parents.

There was once a boy who took a selfie, and the next day became an orphan.

What's the difference between a boy and girl? A boy always carries an average 5in "do not enter" sign.

Have you ever felt an earthquake? It’s not nature; it’s Brandan Bressler.

Son: I heard mom got stung by a few bees this morning. Is she ok? Hospital?

Dad: She's ok now, no hospital.

Dad: She had to take the deep penis.

Son: Umm...... WHAT!?

Dad: I had to inject her with an EPIC PENIS.

Dad: Oh for god's sakes.

Dad: Epi Pen.

What do you call an STD?

Elenji.

What are you doing, son? It has been an hour, and you are still in front of the mirror closing your eyes.

Mum, actually I want to see how I look while sleeping...

Is it bad to hit an orphan?

What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

Well... I mean, they could go to church and try to gather that someone hit them.