ANS jokes

What's the difference between a boy and girl? A boy always carries an average 5in "do not enter" sign.

Have you ever felt an earthquake? It’s not nature; it’s Brandan Bressler.

What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator ;)

Why did the scarecrow get an award? He was outstanding in his field. Okay, I'll admit it's corny.

A letter to all Math:

Dear Math,

Grow up and solve your own problems!

2x6= DO IT YOURSELF!!!!

Why can't you buy an iPhone X?

It's too expensive.

Son: I heard mom got stung by a few bees this morning. Is she ok? Hospital?

Dad: She's ok now, no hospital.

Dad: She had to take the deep penis.

Son: Umm...... WHAT!?

Dad: I had to inject her with an EPIC PENIS.

Dad: Oh for god's sakes.

Dad: Epi Pen.

There was once a boy who took a selfie, and the next day became an orphan.

If your kid beats up an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?

Why can’t an orphan play baseball?

Answer: They don’t know where home is.

Q. What kind of school does an ice cream man go to?

A. Sunday school!

Psst! Don't understand? Well, "Sunday" sounds like "Sundae." Get it now? Nope? Sorry. Plus, it's an ice cream homophone joke.

The orphan had to earn money because he/she didn't have parents to give him/her an allowance.

When you're angry, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

An alligator is in a class, turns out he likes teaching!

You know what should give up and stay dead?

Fortnite.

What is the difference between an emo and a normal person?

An emo slits.

What do you call an iPhone put into a smoothie maker?--An Apple smoothie.

This is an inside joke for my friend Caiden...

"Hey, where’d you get that paint from?" "Ha! Paint!"

An electrician walks into a green house. He sees a red room. He wonders why it's red because Kurt Cobain and his shotgun were sitting there.

My friend is a pimp.

I think he's having an existential crisis. Lately, he just wants to be alone with his thots.