ANS jokes
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
What do you call an orphan taking a family photo? A selfie.
Let's get this right. What's the difference between an egg and a wank?
You can beat an egg, but you can't beat...
Teacher: I was an orphan as a kid.
Students: Damn!
Teacher: Is anyone missing?
Students: Your parents!
What's the difference between you and an egg?
An egg gets laid.
A guy is talking to an Indian therapist.
He had a red dot, and the American thought it was from a sniper rifle and tackled him and said, "I thought the red dot on your head was from a sniper rifle!"
An Ob-Gyn asks a lady to put her feet up on the stirrups.
Doctor: My God, you have the biggest vagina I’ve ever seen!
Woman: You don’t have to say that twice.
Doctor: I didn’t.
What do you call a can opener that doesn't work?
A can't opener.
Obesity kills thousands of times more Americans than shooting does, which teaches us an important lesson:
Shooters do poorly given the size of their targets.
How do you embarrass an archaeologist?
Give him a tampon and ask him what period it came from.
What does a gay guy and an ambulance have in common?
They both get loaded from the rear and go...woo woo woo.
What's the difference between a normal kid and an emo kid?
One has a functioning neck.
What do you call an Iraqi who owns a camel and a goat?
Bisexual.
How can you tell if someone Amish is an alcoholic? They keep falling off the wagon.
Q. How does an emo scratch an itch? A. With a razor blade.
Me walking in to the office:
Principal: Tell me what you did?
Me: I told the special ed kid that the 4th story window was an end portal...
What do you call a suicide bomber in a wheelchair?
An RC-XD.
Are you angry?
Go bully an orphan!
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
What does an orphan and Spider-Man have in common?
They have no "why home" 👹
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
Because they can’t run home.