ANS jokes

Your mom is so fat that when she stood on a scale, it said, "We need an actual person, not an elephant!"

what is the difference between an apple and an orphan?

The apple gets picked.

Why should you never give an orphan a phone?

Because they wouldn't be able to find the home button.

Why shouldn't orphans get a phone?

They would get stuck in an app because they can't find the home button.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Because she wanted to have an affair with the rooster.

What is the difference between an orphan and cotton candy?

Answer: The cotton candy gets picked.

Yo mama so ugly, when she tried to enter an ugly contest, they said they didn't allow professionals.

Had an amazing night with this girl, woke up, and it was my aunt. Now I’m in love.