ANS jokes

Why is an orphan into worshiping Satan?

'Cause they get to call someone "master" and be freaky.

Man: Why can't an orphan use Verizon?

Kid: I don't know why.

Man: Because they have a family plan.

Kid: Well, I need to get another phone service now.

There are 3 men: an American, a French, and an Italian who have to take a trip and take the plane.

The American puts his hand out the window and says: "We are in America, I touched the Statue of Liberty." The French says: "We are in France, I touched the Eiffel Tower." The Italian says: "We are in Italy, I touched the garbage!"

A French, a German, and an Italian make a race to see who resists the most in a room full of flies. The French starts, and after a quarter of an hour, comes out.

Then goes the German, who comes out after an hour. Finally, the Italian enters and comes out after five hours.

The French: "But how did you do it?"

The Italian: "I killed one."

The German: "So what?"

The Italian: "And then they were all busy for the funeral!"

This dad went out hunting, he killed a deer. He came home and he and his wife decided to have it for dinner but not tell their kids. Instead, they made them guess. The dad said, "It's something that daddy calls mommy." The little girl yells to her brother, "Don't eat it! It's an ass!"

Stephen Hawking was a spac. But if you put an E on the end, you get space, and he loved that.

Bro's chin looks like it's from that movie cartoon named Kronk. No wonder he got stung by a bee and took an ibuprofen to reduce the pain, but instead it grew longer.

Q: What does a slice of pizza and an F grade have in common?

A: They're both cheesy.

This guy looked down the aisle and asked, "Hey, are those kids all yours?" And I replied: "No, I work for a condom company, and these kids are just all of my complaints."

Orphan: Have you seen my mommy?

Person: Are you an orphan?

Orphan: Yes?

Person: SON SON??? IS THAT YOU MY LOVE?

Orphan: MOTHER!

Person: Let's go home!

Orphan: Uhhhh

*She was never to be seen again*

I once cummed on my boyfriend's dick. { puts an eggplant emoji }

I like to watch porn too ;)