yo mama so stupid that she got fired from the M&M factory for throwing away all the W's
why did gram-pa pass out because of diebetes
you want to her a cheezy pizza joke-never mind its to cheezy hehehehehe
Three men are outside Heaven's gates waiting to go through Heaven. The angel at the gate tells them, "Depending on the length of time and your faithfulness to your last partner decides your way across the bridge to Heaven."
The first guy says, "I was with my wife for 5 years and cheated 3 times." The angel gives him an old model pick up. The second guy says, "11 years and only once," and is granted a Mercedes.
The last man says, "20 years and not once. I loved her with all my heart," and with the angel impressed, he gets a gold edition Lamborghini and sets off ahead of the other two men. Hours later, the two men catch up to him crying behind the wheel and one says, "I know we are dead, but it could be much worse."
The guy looks up and says, "How! I just went past my wife on a skateboard!"
What does a paedophile say when he gets to heaven? A: Where's the holy baby?
My mom's name is Angel and she is nothing like one:) Especially in bed...
[god creating Asians] “aliright and the design is finished, see our new model the Asian. It has no hair at all”. Angel asks “does it eat normal food”?, god replies, “ (chuckling) oh no not at all.
God: “Steven join us” *sees the staircase to heaven* Steven: “shit”
God creating bees.
God: "Put a needle on their butt."
Angel: "Come on, God, wha-"
God: "Make its puke delicious."
Angel: "WTF"
[God creating spiders] God: make it have 8 legs Angel: ok? bit excessive but ok God: and 8 eyes Angel: You need to calm down and li- God: give it a butt rope
What kind of shorts do clouds wear? Thunderwear
I hope there is a lift to heaven ❤️ I shouldn’t be making jokes tho ❤️😩
why does stephen hawking have the voice of an angel... because on one has ever heard an angel talk.
Q: What has two wings and a halo? A: IAn asian phone call, Wing, Wing, Halo?
You know every time we think of sex an angel dies.
We ran out of dead people hundreds of years ago.
How many dead strippers does it take to change a light.
At least 13 because my basement is still dsrk
Knock knock! Who's there? Heaven. Heaven who? Heaven fun over there?
After God created 24 hours of alternating darkness and light, one of the angels asked him, "What are you going to do now?"
God said, "I think I'm going to call it a day."
Two men were talking about their wives. The first man says, "My wife is an angel." The second man says, "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
Who do you want on your basketball team in heaven?
Peter. He can deny Jesus three times.
