And jokes
*Shotguns in a nutshell*
2B: MUST.
4B: ADD.
6B: MORE.
12B: *B A R R E L S*
*And that's how multi-barrel shotguns were made.*
My parents used to make me and my siblings apologize to the ground when we stomped.
If I had done "it," I would have gotten SO many apologies.
The numbers 19 and 20 got into a fight. 21!
DB: I'm the only shotgun with more than 1 barrel!
Lancaster: Are you sure about that?
DB: huh?
Lancaster: I have 4 barrels!
DB: WHAT!?
Penta Barrel: I got 5!
DB: *insert becoming uncanny*
Dual Hexagon shotgun: I got 12!
The others: HOW!?
*and that's how an argument started.*
There were three women, one was curvy in all the right places, one was skinny but had a booty on her, and last but not least there’s one that has a BBL. Then comes in a famous rapper, guess which one he picked???
Memes
Last night I had sex and she said, "Stop talking about s***, OMG!" and I made her scream so loud she said, "Her balls hurt!"
Kid at Wish: I wish I could be Batman.
Doctor: Okay, shoots mum and dad. Doctor: I guess now you’ll have to be gay, you wanted to be like Batman.
How many emissions does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, they just sit in the dark and cry.
What's the difference between an American and a computer?
Americans don't have trouble shooting!
Dad: Are you gay?
Kid: Yes.
10 days later.
Kid: I’m going to my girlfriend's house.
Dad: I thought you were gay?
Kid: What’s wrong with you? He’s the girly girl of our relationship, dumba**.
Dad: Don’t swear and okay, bud.
What's the difference between a wanted person and a wanted handicapped person? The handicapped person wasn’t last seen on foot.
Stop being disrespectful to all those people and their parents. Oh, I forgot, they don't have any parents.
An orphan asked his caretaker where his parents are, and the caretaker said, "A place called home."
Opinions are like orgasms. The only one that matters is mine and I don't care if you have one.
What's the best way to tell your friend you hate them? Option 1: Kill them. Option 2: Walk away. Option 3: Kill each other.
Me: Why can't I just kms and leave them the pain?
1273. My mother does not love me, nor does anyone, and my family doesn't either.
I was on a website doing homework, and there was this funny a** commercial banner saying: "Eat a bag of Dick's!" It was the funniest sh*t ever!
What’s the difference between a dad and a boomerang? The boomerang comes back.
What do nerds and chicks have in common? They both have four eyes.
Your dad left you 10 years ago and you're 10 years old, so your dad anniversary is today.