And jokes

What's the difference between Kanye West and an orphan?

Kanye West has parents.

What does a priest and a male homosexual have in common?

They both like to suck a big cock inside the men's locker room at the gym.

An Asian walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Do you, too, sing 'One Long Toy Cow'?"

The bartender says to the Asian, "Sorry, I don't speak Chinese."

If you have an Autistic child, don't worry. Put your trust in God and pray it gets kidnapped.

Hello my fellow Canadians, I mean Americans. I, your cool and hip president, has decided to give everyone free ice cream! Even the Russians. Go out to your local ice cream shop and make sure to leave your kids at home!

An orphan was shocked, he called the ambulance. If he forgot he's suicidal, he quickly hung up.

What’s long and black?

The line at the unemployment office.

Lmao Trump and Putin dislike my jokes! 🤣😂

Why doesn't a Muslim girl like her dad and namaz?

Because she has to get on her knees.

Why are school shootings branded “very American”?

1. They usually happen in the USA.

2. They’re like the Fourth of July: there’s a lot of loud banging and kids screaming.

I found an alien in my backyard. I put him to work. He went to a farm, and I never saw him again. Moments later, he is on the Daily Planet acting as a reporter. A green rock smashed my house. I called him back, and he passed out.

I remarked, "You lazy!"

A husband walks into the bedroom door holding two aspirin and a glass of water.

His wife asked what that was for.

"It is for your headache."

"I don't have a headache."

He smiles. "Gotcha!!!!"

When the school shooter shoots the autistic kid and he thinks he's having an orgasm.

Q: What’s a koala's face song? A: Never gonna give you up BECAUSE it hangs on the tree and the person is the tree?

What's the difference between apples and orphans?

Apples get picked.

Why did the Titanic and the iceberg hate each other?

Because the Titanic hit it.

I had to get my dog. Is it a tree? Was your time and I had fun today after dinner. I had...

What is the difference between a human and a burger?

What's yellow and can't swim?

A school bus full of children.

What is yellow and can’t fly?

A school bus.