And jokes

One day whilst walking up a hill, Jack saw a prostitute named Jill. Jill was dressed in kinky, leather gear that made Jack really, really horny.

Jack, who hadn't stuck it in for a few weeks, was keen to ask this sexy young maiden how much she would charge. "1 buck for a suck, 2 buck for a fuck," she said as she stroked his ever-hardening one-eyed snake.

"Yeah, I'll have both of them," said Jack, who was about to cum in his trousers. So Jill led Jack to behind the well, and they sucked and fucked for an hour. After that, they both contracted AIDS and died of it, as they did not see a doctor. THE END

Little Steven was scared to take a shower by himself, so he asked his mum to shower with him. She said ok just don’t look up. He looked up and said wow what are those. She said they are headlights. He looked under and stuck his finger in it and said oh what is that. She said that’s a Pu-pu-pu Bush!!

The next day Steven’s mom wasn’t home so he asked his Papa can I shower with you? He said ok just don’t look up. Well Steven looked up and said WTH IS THAT? His dad said it’s a Snake. That night he asked his parents if he can sleep with them. They said ok Just don’t look under the covers. He grew bored then looked under and Screamed mom turn on the headlights There’s a snake in the bush.

What's the difference between Black and White people?

Blacks don't need N-Word Passes.

[God creating Asians] “Alright, and the design is finished, see our new model, the Asian. It has no hair at all.”

Angel asks, “Does it eat normal food?”

God replies, “(chuckling) Oh no, not at all.”

A young 38 year old happy Muslim migrant living in Sydney wants to wed a beautiful young bride. He asks the local Aussie the minimum age to wed his yet unchosen bride. "Eighteen," the Aussie says, sipping a beer. "She has to be Eighteen."

Okay, the Muslim man sighed, with disappointment and walks off. Next day he arrives with a 13 year old girl.

"Wtf are you doing?" Aussie says?

"You say this is okay," Muslim replied. "Fuck no, she must be at least Eighteen you sick bastard," says Aussie, flicking away his Winnie Blue cigarette. Muslim man leaves angrily.

Next day Happy Muslim settles on a 14 year old girl from Punchbowl to be his bride. Aussies jaw drops, "What is wrong with you mate?" asks Aussie.

Muslim man replies "You tell me to choose 'a teen', 'a teen', I chose a teen and now you come for my third and now fourth choice. Fuck you!"

Aussie: "Eighteen not 'a teen' you sick mongrel."

Yo momma so ugly when she the and ugly weird the and she ugly!

What is the difference between an orphan and a snake?

A snake has a home to go to underground.

I gave a blind kid a gun and told him it was a hairdryer.

What takes knowledge to do and also takes knowledge away?

Looking down the barrel and pulling the trigger. 😂

What did the Emo and the Orphan have in common?

They both hang with the trees.

Little Johnny meets Big Suzy.

Little Johnny and Big Suzy got together.

Little Johnny still regrets getting together with her to this very day.

The end.

Jesus seemed like he was probably a good guy; healed the sick, fed the hungry, and gave good advice.

Jesus had only one flaw: he was always hanging around.

What is wrong with having chocolate for dessert? It tastes like shit, and I hate it.

Why are people so good at basketball? They can run, steal, and shoot!

What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?

One gets picked.

Okay, who the heck is watersharky? He just tries to "help" people, and he just posts stupid songs because he acts like he is depressed.

What's handsome and smart, you can hear him and see him? It's you good-looking guys! So sad you can't read this since you're blind. Oh geez, I just found this website and I want to make people laugh. Too bad they can't see the joke.

Stranger: Do you want a lollipop?

Kid: No, I hate lollipops, so yeah, and you are not my daddy.

What’s the difference between an orphan and a donut?

People want donuts.

Gwen, we can chat in 2 months. My aunt just died from COVID, and it is taking forever for us to get there to California. I love you, your boyfriend, Prince!