i swear in America, one school shooter can take good care of hundreds of kids, but hundreds of soldiers cant even win a war, might as well send all your school shooters over there
All of the sudden if your republican your raciest and Communism is a symbol of freedom what happened to the proud men our founding fathers were damit!
well being an American is just a joke itself
what is the best whey to make friends with an America boy you bunch
why are americans so dumb?
because they shoot the ones that go to school
north america best america
Why do Americans suck at chess.......... they already lost two towers
So I was on a discord call the other day and one of my friends American buddies joined and we had a conversation.
Until they say: when did pounds change to quid.
And I said: 'they're the exact same thing.'
Then they said:
"but when did it happen?"
So I said:
"when did school change to shooting range?"
What's Americas no.1 class
target practice
What do you call a country who needs another race just to be the best country in sports? America
school's being safe
CHEESE
On a scale of 1 to America, how free are you tonight?
In the beginning of the 20th century, a young girl called Edit left her home country of Sweden, and crossed the Ocean to make a new life in America. Unfortunately, it did not go all that well, and she found herself soon homeless, begging for food or money to survive.
She used to occupy a street next to a theater; not because it meant hefty handouts, but because it was a place where no other beggars or police bothered her; every night, a new crowd came to see a show, and the cute young girl found just enough mercy to survive. In fact, she did so well, that she decided to afford herself a small piece of cake every tuesday - just to keep her spirits up.
One tuesday, she could not get a break. Looked like she will go without cake this week. Then, a strange looking gentleman stopped near her. He soon heard her story, and decided to share his fortune.
Gentleman: I work as a magician in the touring show - today we performed here. Some nights, our guests want to gamble with us afterwards, and I make sure to bring home more than I came with. I try to keep it moderate - but today, this obnoxious drunk was loaded, so I emptied his pockets. Here, take this precious coin.
Do you know why God created wars? To teach Americans geography.
(found on web) There was an American wrestler from Texas named John, who throughout his high school career had never lost a match. As he went on into college he continued undefeated. He became a national icon and symbol of American strength.
News began to circulate of a Russian wrestler who was fierce and unstoppable. As each wrestlers legends grew, a match was set up between the two, America versus Russia. The match would be held in Texas.
John began training immediately. Every day his coach would tell him, “This Russian has a move called the Mongolian Death Grip. No one has ever escaped the Mongolian Death Grip. DO NOT let him get you in the Mongolian Death Grip”
The day of the match finally came. Just before each wrestler stepped onto the mat in front of the capacity crowd, the coach once again said, “Whatever you do, do not let him get you in the Mongolian death grip. No one has ever escaped the Mongolian death grip”.
Four seconds into the match, the Russian had the American in the Mongolian death grip. The coach buried his face into his hands and cursed John for not listening to his advice. All of the sudden he heard the crowd irrupt in a chant of USA USA USA. He looked up and saw the Russian pinned by John. The coach ran out to meet John and embarrassingly told him, “I didn’t see... Once he had you in the Mongolian Death Grip I looked away. How in the world did you get out of the Mongolian death grip?”
With heavy breath, John told him “Well coach, that Russian grabbed me and twisted my body in ways I never imagined possible. I was wincing in pain when I open my eyes and right in front of me were two testicles. So I bit them.”
“What???” Said the coach... “John I don’t think that is legal. You could be disqualified”
“I don’t know about that coach. But I can tell you one thing. You ain’t got no idea how strong you are until you bite your own balls”
im in school shooting #USA
Straights are ALWAYS asking LGBTQ+ people why they have such GOOD FASHION SENSE, we didn't spend all that time in the closet for nothing,honey ;)
I don't even know why to joke about America, it's a joke itself TO THE FUCKING EARTH
What do u call the most fucking racist and obnoxious country in the fucking entire fucking omniverse? NORTH AMERICA AND IF U DISAGREE JUST CUS UR AMERICAN I DON'T GIVE A FUCK U LOW LIFE CUNTS, plus if u don't think ur racist um hello people? Motherfucking George Floyd
