Agriculture jokes
Why couldn’t the peanut finish the project?
Work came to a grinding halt.
What is a popular name for girl peanuts?
Michelle.
What kind of nuts come in cans?
Creamed a-corn.
What is a cowboy’s favorite tree?
A horse chestnut tree.
Why do orphans pick apples? Because that's the only thing they can pick.
Why did the scarecrow get promoted?
He was out-standing.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?
Apples get picked.
I had a calf for a while. The milk was bad until we bought a heifer.
Roses are red,
my life is a disaster,
the children are fast,
but the combine is F A S T E R!
What’s a green cucumber?
A carrot.
If a walnut is a nut on the wall, then what is a peanut?
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What is the similarity between orphans and apples?
They both get thrown out.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Interrupting cow.
Interrupting cow who?
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
What fruit do scarecrows love the most?
Straw-berries.
What is it called when corn stalks have a baby?
The cream of the crop.
What is long, hard, and has cum in it?
A cucumber.
Why did the baby cow cross the road?
To find its mom who has the milk.
What is the same thing between apples and orphans?
Apples actually get picked.
What do a blonde chick and a field of wheat have in common?
They're both bound to get plowed at some point in time.