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Advertising Jokes

Priest

Why did the Catholic priest suck dick at a glory hole?

Because someone asked him what he would do for a Klondike bar.

Suicide

Nike isn't helpful for suicidal people. You can't tell them to "Just Do It."

Kanye West

I'm shocked that Kanye West never tried to get Carrie Underwood's number after Carrie starred in a pro-Aryan ad for Almay.

Grim Reaper

What did the grim reaper say when his favorite car commercial came on? "Safe life repair, safe life replace!"

Will to live

Advertisement: "What's in your wallet?"

Me: "The same amount of money as there is my will to live... ;_)"

Bounty

So, I heard Bounty, the maker of paper towels, has decided to get into the Male Enhancement business...

...their new slogan?

The Quicker Pecker Upper.

Nike

Let's play pretend. I'll be Nike and you'll be McDonald's, cuz I'll be doin' it and you'll be lovin' it.

Priest

What does a Catholic Priest and a commercial from the 80s have in common? They both ask people, "Where's the meat?"

KFC

KFC doesn’t use toilet paper because it is finger lickin' good!