Why did the Catholic priest suck dick at a glory hole?
Because someone asked him what he would do for a Klondike bar.
Nike isn't helpful for suicidal people. You can't tell them to "Just Do It."
I'm shocked that Kanye West never tried to get Carrie Underwood's number after Carrie starred in a pro-Aryan ad for Almay.
Advertisement: "What's in your wallet?"
Me: "The same amount of money as there is my will to live... ;_)"
What did the grim reaper say when his favorite car commercial came on? "Safe life repair, safe life replace!"
So, I heard Bounty, the maker of paper towels, has decided to get into the Male Enhancement business...
...their new slogan?
The Quicker Pecker Upper.
Why do midgets work at Tesco?
Because every little helps.
Virginia is false advertising. Couldn't find many virgins there.
Let's play pretend. I'll be Nike and you'll be McDonald's, cuz I'll be doin' it and you'll be lovin' it.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because KFC was offering free seeds.
Your forehead is so big that it was used as a billboard.
What does a Catholic Priest and a commercial from the 80s have in common? They both ask people, "Where's the meat?"
Dear clothing websites if it's put of stock DO NOT ADVERTISE IT
My favorite sex position is the McDonald's.
Ba da ba ba ba, I'm lovin' it!
we must start a propaganda for baked beans
Your forehead so big I could sell advertising space by the mile on it
Mr. Smith: Neona, tell us what you have for the biggest competition that we can do to keep our competitors out of the winning streak.
Neona: Will thought we used more sales and more advertising.
Mr. Smith: It's already a good idea. Now what about the business plan? We need it as recommendations to keep the business going. Tell me, what do you have in mine?
Neona: It is better to always have a plan. I was thinking that we can get higher prices and always get great deals, the people will go nuts for a great deal!
Mr. Smith: Perfect. Now let's take a 5 minute break.
Mr. Smith: Ok, 5 minutes is up!
Now Neona, I know you are an intern, but what are the best things we can do for the company?
Neona: Hmm...lets see...will we can start with all the things people love! If this is going to work then we have have to......
