What's the difference between Kobe Bryant and Jeffrey Epstein?
Only 2 13-year-olds went down on Kobe's helicopter.
What do you call plane crash victims?
Down to earth people.
My aunt used to say, "Slow and steady wins the race." She died in a fire.
What's the fastest way to get to the hospital? Stand in the middle of the road.
My grandma always said, "Slow and steady wins the race."
She died in a fire.
Why did the chicken cro-
UM, ACTUALLY, THE CHICKEN CAN'T CROSS THE ROAD UNLESS IT'S UNDER SOME ROOSTER OR HEN SUPERVISION OR ELSE THE CAR WILL CRASH THE CHICKEN, AND THEY WILL DIE. 🤓
Yesterday I saw a guy spill all his Scrabble letters on the road. I asked him, “What’s the word on the street?”
A blonde accidentally kills a cop and calls the police.
She exclaims, “Hello, is this 911?”
The other person, “Yes, what is your emergency?”
The blonde answered, “I called to inform you that you’re 910 now.”
What happens when a strawberry gets run over crossing the street? Traffic jam.
I was once playing the bottle flip challenge on the school table with my friend, and when it was his turn, the bottle fell to his eggplant! 😱😂
I turned the light on, and my dad said turn it off, so I unplugged his life support.
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into the school fire and said, "Hot wheels!"
Did you see the blind guy trip on a can?
He didn't either.
When you accidentally turn in your suicide note instead of your essay to the teacher, but she still gives you an A.
I was playing laser tag with my ex, but I (wink) didn't realize I had a real gun.
What do you say when you hear someone tripping over at night?
Goddammit, Jamal!
I've been hit by several things in my life.
Sadly, never a car.
You are recently injured because of your job as a driving instructor, so you couldn't go on vacation with your friends.
Your friends tell you that they have an Asian pilot.
You realize, "They have a -1% survival rate!"
Where did Josh go after getting lost on a minefield? Everywhere.
What did the plane that crashed on the ground say? Let me crash between those legs, girl!
Sorry, cringy joke.
