Absence jokes
Why do orphans have water with their cereal?
Because their dad never came back.
An orphan walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand, "Hey, bum, bum, bum, got a family?"
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't matter, he's not coming.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
The apple actually gets picked.
Why do orphans eat cereal without milk?
Their dad never came with it.
When an orphan takes a picture, it’s a family portrait.
What do you call an orphan's family portrait?
A self-portrait.
A man was on the street and went up to a kid wearing rags. The man asked, "Hey, are you an orphan?"
The kid said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"
The man said, "Your parents."
If you can't see your family... you're an orphan.
Fatherless jokes.
Why can't orphans be gay?
They have no one to call "daddy/mommy."
I was walking in a park today and a little girl I asked, "Where are your parents?" She said, "Gone. My dad went to go get the milk and never came back," and I said, "Oof."
Why are there only 363 days in an orphan's calendar?
They don’t have fathers or Mother’s Day.
An orphan thinks he finally sees his mom, but then he realizes it's air.
What's the one school event that orphans don't go to?
Parents' evening.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your dad.
What do you call a photo of an orphan?
A family photo.
Kid: Hey, why am I an orphan?
Adult: I don't know, ask your parents.
What type of cake can orphans not eat? Homemade.
What is an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang because it actually comes back.