Absence jokes
What is the difference between the pizza guy and my dad?
The pizza guy shows up when you call him.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally.
The kid's dad was a magician because he disappeared and never came back.
Orphans are so vulnerable; they have no parents to tell. - Masai
Why do orphans have water with their cereal?
Because their dad never came back.
If you can't see your family... you're an orphan.
What does an orphan's family photo called?
A selfie.
I was walking in a park today and a little girl I asked, "Where are your parents?" She said, "Gone. My dad went to go get the milk and never came back," and I said, "Oof."
Why can't orphans be gay?
They have no one to call "daddy/mommy."
Fatherless jokes.
A man was on the street and went up to a kid wearing rags. The man asked, "Hey, are you an orphan?"
The kid said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"
The man said, "Your parents."
What is an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang because it actually comes back.
Where did your dad go? Because I saw him at the milk shop. Oh wait, there isn't one.
What do you call an orphan's family portrait?
A self-portrait.
What's the one school event that orphans don't go to?
Parents' evening.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
The apple actually gets picked.
Why do orphans eat cereal without milk?
Their dad never came with it.
When an orphan takes a picture, it’s a family portrait.
Why are there only 363 days in an orphan's calendar?
They don’t have fathers or Mother’s Day.
Why do orphans hate any milk?
Their dad did not come back for 10 years. Oh, sorry, he got lost in the store! 🤧