Absence jokes
Why are there only 363 days in an orphan's calendar?
They don’t have fathers or Mother’s Day.
An orphan thinks he finally sees his mom, but then he realizes it's air.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your dad.
What do you call a photo of an orphan?
A family photo.
Why do orphans hate any milk?
Their dad did not come back for 10 years. Oh, sorry, he got lost in the store! 🤧
What is an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang because it actually comes back.
When I mist, I miss.
If orphans aren’t religious, they really have no father. 😂
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
The apple actually gets picked.
When an orphan takes a picture, it’s a family portrait.
What's the one school event that orphans don't go to?
Parents' evening.
Why can't the orphan go on a field trip?
Because he can't sign the parent's signature.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't matter, he's not coming.
An orphan walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand, "Hey, bum, bum, bum, got a family?"
Where did your dad go? Because I saw him at the milk shop. Oh wait, there isn't one.
Yo mama's so—oh wait, you don't have one.
Let's see what the orphans are gonna tell their parents about this: "Hey you buttheads, you stink!"
Looks like they didn't tell their parents.
What is the favorite movie of orphans?
Spider-Man: Homecoming.
Why do orphans have 363 days in a year?
Because they have no Father's or Mother's days.
You will find your dad that left to get the milk before your hairline.