Absence jokes
I felt bad for the orphan because he couldn't go on a field trip, you know why?
Parent signature: _________
What relationship status fits an orphan?
Single.
What's the same with your dad and Retail Row?
They are both off the map.
Knock knock, Who's there? Dad. You came back?
Why did the orphan go to the woods? To take a *what*?
So true
What does an orphan call a family photo?
A selfie.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
One of them gets picked.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal?
Because the dad never came back with the cow.
Your dad went to get the milk, but he was actually trying to find his father. He wasn't there.
What do you call an orphan that has a brother? The second one without one.
What's the difference between you and my dad? You come home.
What are two things that an orphan can’t have?
Two parents.
Why does an orphan eat cereal with water? Because their dad didn't come back with the milk.
Me: *watching TV*
Mom: Omg, no way, your dad is coming!
Me: Really?
Mom: Obviously not, he never loved or wanted you.
Did you know the "f" in "orphan" stands for family?
Kid: There is no "f" in "orphan."
There is no family.
What is a selfie of an orphan called?
A family photo.
We have a new member of staff here today. He has no arms, no legs, and no body. He will be known as "The Head."
Why can’t orphans go on field trips? Because they need parent permission.
Why is daonlyjuanhere an orphan?
Because he is the only one.
Why do orphans only have 363 days of the year?
Because they don't have a Mother's and Father's Day.