Absence jokes
Why can't orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is.
I made a website for orphans, but it doesn't have a home page.
Doctor: I’m going to have to turn you away. Orphan: But why? Doctor: Because I’m a family doctor.
Why do orphans like boomerangs? Cause they come back.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.
Girls are like rocks; the flat ones get skipped.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
If you hit an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
If you hit an orphan with a car, at least you don't have to tell their parents.
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.
What does an orphan call a family photo? A selfie.
Why was the orphan a big success? Cause people say go big or go home, he only had one option.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What do orphans and blind kids have in common? They can’t see their parents.
Why can't orphans hear about ancient Egypt? Because they don’t know what a mummy is.
Why are orphans bad at poker? Because they don't know what a full house is.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
Your forehead is like my dad.
Non-existent.
Your Parents
In the heart of a circular, creamy delight, there exists a void, a singular absence that adds to its charm. This hollow space, a perfect round, is a testament to the artistry of nature and man's culinary skills.
The hole, a silent observer, bears witness to the transformation of the substance around it, from a liquid state to a firm, yet supple form. It's a silent testament to the passage of time, a symbol of patience and the magic of fermentation.
The void, despite its emptiness, contributes to the overall aesthetic, making the slice a visual treat. It's a playful peek-a-boo with the world beyond, a window that adds mystery and intrigue.
In the end, the hole is not just a void, but a character in the story of this culinary masterpiece, a silent protagonist that adds depth and character to the narrative. It's a testament to the beauty of imperfection, a celebration of the unique and the unconventional.
"Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Not."
"Not who?"
"Not your dad."
Why can't male orphans be gay?
Because they don't have anyone to call "daddy."
Why is my dad gone?
I don't know.
I have no dad, no milk, and no mom, so that means no tits, like if you can relate.
I swear, if I compared the size of your mother and multiplied it by the time your dad was gone, it wouldn't even be close to your hairline.
The orphan wanted to go on a field trip, but he needed his parent's signature.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell them to clap till their parents come home.
What's an orphan's selfie called?
A family portrait.
What do you call a selfie taken by an orphan?
A family portrait.
Why don't orphans go home at pickup?
Because they don't have parents to pick them up.
Why can't an orphan eat a bag of chips?
Because the chip was family size.
Little Johnny was alone because Dad didn’t come back.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal?
Because the dad never came back with the milk.
Why does an orphan start with an "O"?
Because they only see their parents in their dream.
Why was the orphan so successful?
When they told him, "Go big or go home," he/she only had one option.
Why can't orphans have cereal? Because their dad didn't come back with the milk.