Worst Jokes Ever
My grandpa warned people the Titanic would sink, but they wouldn’t listen, so he kept warning them. Then he was kicked out of the theater.
If I grew a nanometer taller for every 2/10 woman expecting a 6’3”+ guy, I would be considered attractive.💀
Your mom is so fat, she starts with the letter O in the alphabet because O.B.C.D. (Obesity).
Why did the orphan not call 911 when he saw a tower catch fire?
'Cause he did not want any kids to go through the same pain.
I met a baseball player, so I told him to make a home run, and he just looked at me with sadness. I don't know why.
By the way, he was an orphan.
Mom asks, "Why are you are THIS show??? It's DISTRACTING you from SCHOOL!!!!!"
The child says, "Don't you mean SCHOOL is distracting ME from this AWESOME show?"
Mom whispers, "Oh, you DEAD."
Mom asks, "Who are you talking to?"
The child said, "A mistake."
You're so ugly that when you were born, your mother asked, "How does my little treasure look?", and the doctor replied, "I think we should bury it immediately."
You were supposed to be born in the tree.
The sticks were your siblings.
Beautiful people should read this quote: "God gave you beauty but not brains."
Yes, I have gained weight. I have also gained more brains. Do you want some? You talk like you definitely need some more.
On April Fool's, go to an orphanage and tell them that their parents are here to pick them up.
Jack and Jill went up the hill.
Jack fell down, his ass was bound, and Jill continued up the hill.
Jack came back and beat Jill's back, and he got the ultimate kill.
Who's the most popular guy at the nudist colony? The one who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen doughnuts.
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the kings horses and all the kings men, said "Fuck him, he's only an egg."
What did the man say about someone who had a seizure?
"Jit was lagging."
What's the difference between a (hypothetical) girl and cancer?
Her dad didn't beat cancer.
Why did a Mexican go to Home Depot?
Because he thought it said "Home Deport."
What do you call a man who loves Adidas and Puma and drives a Volkswagen? Potential Nazi.
Did you know one of the singers of YMCA had AIDS? Y-M-C-AIDS.