50s jokes

Did you know about 9 months after a power outage 50% more babies are born because it is dark?

In memory of Michael Jackson, Starbucks and various other establishments are introducing the Jackson tea. It's 50 year old water, with a 7 year old tea bag.

Q: Why are the 49ers called the 49ers?

A: 'Cause they can't make it past the 50-yard line.

What concert only costs 45 cents?

50 Cent featuring Nickelback.

How do you paint a wall red?

You shoot a baby with a .50 cal.

There are 50 dogs and 48 cats.

How many are hungry?

A. 10

I know a girl in a wheelchair. I realize now why she couldn’t do sports because the coaches wanted 100% from her, but she was only able to give 50%.

I'm 50% human, so that 50% stupid is 100% you.

You telling me Julius Caesar, who has been dead for well over 50 years, made this salad?

Want to save 50% on your Chinese?

Just ask before you pay.

My dad is now a milkman.

Now I have over 50 brothers and sisters.

I’d make a joke to Fetty Wap on this, but there’s only a 50/50 chance he’ll SEE this.

How many times does 50 fit into 9?

Get in a van and find out!

Me: DOCTOR! DOCTOR! I HAVE 50 SECONDS TO LIVE!

Doctor: Sit down for a minute.

What do me and a casino machine have in common? It takes about 50 pumps to get to the jackpot.

What do you call something that has 50 legs but can't walk? 25 disabled people!

What do you call a cow grazing a field with 50% grass and 50% weed?

High steaks gambling.

Hello, I am back with more mind-blowing facts.

1. Why are cookies called cookies and bacon called bacon when you bake cookies and cook bacon?

2. If you tuck your shirt into your trousers and it is called tucking your shirt in, does that mean if your shirt is over your trousers, doesn't that mean it's called tucking your trousers into your shirt?

If I get 50 likes on this, I swear. 🦋

Chuck Norris once killed 50 people with a grenade. Then he threw the grenade.