A woman goes into labor with her child. The doctor says that they have invented a new device to transfer the pain of childbirth to the father. He asks if it is okay to use the new device. The couple agrees, and so he turns the pain to the father to 10%. The man feels nothing. They then bump it up to 20%. He still feels nothing. They keep doing this until they have the machine up to 100%. The man still felt nothing so they go home happy, until they find the milkman dead on the porch.
100 Jokes
What does a husband of a woman do when he is horny?
He goes on a business trip with 100 $1 dollar bills.
Who are the world's fastest readers?
9/11 victims. 100 stories in 11 seconds.
Grandpa: "You can't have phones within 15 feet of the table."
Me: "And you aren't allowed within 100 feet of the elementary school."
Runescape is the only form of birth control that is 100% effective.
I know a girl in a wheelchair. I realize now why she couldn’t do sports because the coaches wanted 100% from her, but she was only able to give 50%.
I donated 100 dollars to a blind children’s charity. Too bad they won’t ever see a dime of it.
How do you fit 100 babies in a bowl? A blender.
How do you get them out? Tortilla chips.
Cindy goes up to her dad and says: "Daddy, can I have $100 for a new dress?"
Her dad almost gags and says: "$100! You're only 12, what do you want with such an expensive dress?"
Cindy says: "Well daddy, I'll look really pretty in it and I promise to look after it ..."
Dad gives in and says: "OK, give me a head-job then".
He flops it out and Cindy just get the end in her mouth and goes: "Eeee-yooo - that taste's like shit!"
Dad goes: "Well, your brother wanted to borrow the car this afternoon ..."
What bounces up and down at 100 miles per hour?
A baby tied to the back of a pick up truck.
What’s black, white, and red? A nun that fell down a 100 flight of stairs.
What’s black, white, and laughing? The nun that pushed her!
How do you get 100 babies in the back of a pick up truck? Blender.
How do you get them back out? Straw.
Why does Sally have 100 sisters? She lives in an orphanage.
What is worse than a dead baby in a trash can?
100 dead babies in a trash can.
What is worse than that?
There's a live one at the bottom.
What is worse than that?
It eats its way out.
What is worse than that?
It comes back for seconds.
What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Mustang Challenger?
I don't have a Mustang Challenger in my garage.
How do you get 100 Pikachus on a bus?
- Pokémon
What do you call 100 rabbits walking backwards?
A receding hare line.
Why do Scottish men wear kilts?
Sheep can hear unzipping trousers from a distance of 100 yards.
Why are New Yorkers so good at reading?
Some of them went through 100 stories in 10 seconds.
