You jokes

The reason why you have a high pitched voice is because you always sing opera.

You gonna poop someday.

My sister: See you at home in about an hour.

Me: Okay.

My sister: Sister, where are you? *She looks out the window.*

Me: Sis, I'm here, can't you see me?

Sister: OMG, she's dead!

Me: Yeah, I know, but can't you see me?

What do you call an orphan? Homeless.

What's an orphan's worst favorite movie? Home Alone.

Why can't homeless people find a home? Because they're orphans.

What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?

A family portrait.

"My sister said she was the only smart one in the class."

"What about the teacher you learn *from*?"

Comment anything if you like what you saw with Gwen in her bra!

Prince, are you really gay, because I love you with all my heart and pray for you all the time!

PLEASE CHOOSE ME INSTEAD! :(

Gwen, are you mad at me? Cause that was a faker.

Like the faker Gwen?

Neighbor 1: Knock knock.

Neighbor 2: You forgot the 3rd knock.

Odin: .....

Did you hear Stephen Hawking has a new book out?

It's about time!

Why did I have to pay $300 on Uber?

I had to get from your forehead to your big ass nose.

Hello, I am typing with the microphone, euros, hello bro and 0LXDXD bra, that’s funny, and also you are gay. Ha ha ha ha ha, get it done by eight.

The waiter comes and asks you for the check. Instead I give him a 20 dollar bill and say, "Boy, you can keep it!"

Dear Kenya, I am very sorry for how rude I was to you. I just want you to know that I'm on your side and I'll never do it again. - Sincerely, Gwen

Oh my Prince, I've loved you ever since the day we met.

When I was caught in your net of love, sweet love... It's all above...

Two gays came into the bar and said, "What's up, you big faf mother of hell?"

You know how girls say, "I would have sex with you if you were the last person on earth"? Well, who's gonna stop me?

"I love you with all my heart."

"Prince, where are you?"