Why jokes

Liver

2 views ·

Why did everyone dislike Little Johnny at school?

'Cause he pierced everyone's livers with a .357 magnum.

Carpet

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My wife said, "Why oh why have you ordered carpet, our house is lovely?"

Thankfully the carpet was put to good use in the end, no more stupid comments coming from a rolled up Emily in the bottom of the ocean!

Boat

A man was almost about to drown. A boat said, "Do you need help?" And he said no.

After the boat left, another boat came to the sea, and they asked if he needed help, and he said no.

And he asked God, "Why didn't you help me?"

God said, "I sent you two big boats, you dummy!"

Penis

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Why did the penis go fly?

Because a girl sucked it too hard, it went flying away.

Number

Why was one afraid of every number in the world?

Because ONE wanted TWO get something THREE FOUR FIVE at the yard sale, but SIX was not there. SEVEN EIGHT NINE as well. When all but ONE remained, it got TENse.

Iceberg

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Why did the glacier send the iceberg to college?

Because, in order for ice to exist, it must retain a temperature of less than... ZERO DEGREES at the atomic level!

Form

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Why is "T" well-respected, but more in its lowercase form?

It crossed the line with Jesus.

Orphanage

Me: (Jaiden) Why are you crying? Do you know where your parents are?

Orphan: *Sobs* "No."

God, I love working at an orphanage!

Girl

14 views ·

Why did the little girl cry twice?

Because you wiped your shitty bloody duck on her favorite teddy bear.