Why do orphans commit crimes?
Because they want to be wanted.
I will never understand why manslaughter is illegal.
Men should be able to laugh at whatever they want.
Why did the blind man cross the road?
Don't ask me, he can't even see where he's going.
Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he gets a hole in one.
My friend: Hey, why are you always smiling?
Me: 'Cause life is a joke and weβre all slacking it off.
Why are Mexicans good at Uno?
They always steal the green card.