Why jokes
What music scares balloons?
Pop music.
Why would the banana scream "ouch?"
Because it is getting peeled.
Me: Help, I'm stuck in a trap.
Friend: What kind?
Me: It's called life. Yeah, I've been trying to get out of it for six years now, it just won't let me go.
Friend: That's not funny..
Me: Yeah? Nor is wanting to die, yet I'm still over here laughing every time I try to.
Friend: I'm calling your mom.
Me: She knows.
Friend: What's she doing to help, then?
Me: She's supposed to help?
Friend: Have you told your dad?
Me: I will when he comes back.
Friend: Where is he?
Me: I don't know, he's been gone for 15 years.
Friend: ....
Me: What?
Friend: Why?
Me: Why what?
Friend: Why would you joke like that?
Me: I was joking..
Friend: I know.
Me: Oh. I didn't know.
Friend:...
Me: Have a nice day, I'll see you tomorrow... Maybe...
Why did Hitler lose the war?
Because Göring ate every last airplane, tank, artillery, ship, and ammunition!
Why is it so easy to bully an orphan? What are they gonna do, tell their mum?
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t run home.
Why can’t orphans eat a big bag of chips?
They are family sized.
Why don't gay men perform anilingus on each other in Greece?
Because anilingus is against the law in Greece.
Why don't gay men have anal sex in Greece? because anal sex between gay men is against the law.
Why don't gay Greek men have anal sex with each other in Greece?
Because anal sex between gay men is against the law in Greece.
Why don't gay Greek men in Greece perform anilingus on each other?
Because anilingus between two gay men is against the law in Greece.
Why did people bully the burning circuit?
It was too short.
Why did the MOSFET go to jail?
It had a charge for battery.
Why do orphans use iPhone X's?
Because they can't find home.
Why do people have sex?
Because they like going "Ahhhhhhhhhhh fuck me, bitch, I love you!"
Why are mountains 🏔 so funny? Because they’re hill areas, do you get it? They are hill areas, like a mountain is a hill area. It sounds like hilarious, so you get it.
Why couldn’t the dairy farmer find his home? He lost the whey!😅
(I want to apologize in advance. These are very dark jokes.)
What’s red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
I was going to tell a dead baby joke, but I decided to abort.
Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? His wife is dead.
Why does Helen Keller hate porcupines? They’re painful to look at.
Why can’t orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is.
Give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a few hours. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes. The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked off with her cardboard box.
My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children. If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
Why are gay people gay? Because they are gay.
Wanna hear a funny joke? Well, that was why you were here... Here's the joke: Your life :)
Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because they don't know where home is.