Your mama is so fat, when she went camping, the bears hid their food from her.
Location is in London by the way. One day a fatass came home and told his friend that he lost money. His friend, "Oh for once you lost some pounds!"
Why are fish easy to measure?
Because they bring their own scales.
Yo mama so fat Thanos had to clap.
What's blue and doesn't weigh much?
Light blue.
Your mama so fat, when Santa saw her he said, "Ho, ho, holy s***!"
I know five fat people, and you're three of them.
When fat people smash it must feel like a huge submarine hitting u
aunt: on internet buying weight loss pills for 15 dollars neice: i found that show on Netflix that you wanted to watch its 3 dollars to watch aunt: im not paying for that shit neice: yet u sit there and buy weight loss pills
I'd make a joke about an obese person, but it won't work out.
why are cheetahs the best animals? The cheetah is the fastest land animal in the world. They can reach a top speed of around 113 km per hour. A cheetah can accelerate from 0 to 113 km in just a few seconds. Cheetahs are extremely fast however they tire quickly and can only keep up their top speed for a few minutes before they are too tired to continue. Cheetahs are smaller than other members of the big cat family, weighing only 45 – 60 kilograms. One way to always recognise a cheetah is by the long, black lines which run from the inside of each eye to the mouth. These are usually called “tear lines” and scientists believe they help protect the cheetah’s eyes from the harsh sun and help them to see long distances. Cheetahs are the only big cat that cannot roar. They can purr though and usually purr most loudly when they are grooming or sitting near other cheetahs. While lions and leopards usually do their hunting at night, cheetahs hunt for food during the day. A cheetah has amazing eyesight during the day and can spot prey from 5 km away. Cheetahs cannot climb trees and have poor night vision. With their light body weight and blunt claws, cheetahs are not well designed to protect themselves or their prey. When a larger or more aggressive animal approaches a cheetah in the wild, it will give up its catch to avoid a fight. Cheetahs only need to drink once every three to four days.
Why couldn't the button get off the couch? Because his butt weighed a ton! (butt-ton)
My wife wanted a present that could go from zero to 80 very quickly.
So I got her a new set of bathroom scales.
My friend’s mother was never a font of sympathy, but always the one to see beyond the darkness.
Upon learning about her daughter’s cancer diagnosis she said, “Well honey, at least you’ll lose some weight!”
What's the difference between an American 12-year-old and an African 12-year-old? About 40 pounds.
You're so damn fat that the only belt that fits you is an asteroid belt.
I congratulated my friend and losing all that baby weight she started crying told me I should make them for miscarriage like that......
What do you call an overweight psychic?
A four chin teller.
Q- How much does a skeleton weigh? A- a skeleTON
Why do Indian man marry fat Woman
