Want jokes
Why do cops never put orphans in jail?
Because they aren't wanted.
What excuse can you use if you find out your date is a rape victim and you don't want the baggage?
Say you've parked your car in a bad spot and are just going to move it, then move your car all the way back to your home address.
Why did the Twin Towers go to Uber Eats?
Because they wanted something plain.
Me: Mom, the weight scale wants your weight, not your phone number!
Why can’t orphans be criminals?
Because they’re not wanted!
There was this Down syndrome boy that always wanted to be a cop, and he did. He pulled someone over and said, "Know why I pulled you over?"
The guy replied, "Because I was speeding?"
He said, "No, because you're black."
Why does Darth Vader always choke people?
Because he wants them to feel what his Sith Lord does to him in bed.
You are so fat and ugly, Chucky didn't even want to play with you.
The orphan wanted to go on a field trip, but he needed his parent's signature.
The Emo kid wanted to go on a field trip, but he needed his parent's signature.
A guy asks his priest friend what he wants to eat, and the priest says "bad boys." Then his friend asks, "What kebab do you want?" and the priest says, "B Bricked up Caucasian or Asian will do."
Why can't orphans be criminals?
Because they're never wanted.
I want your weight, not your phone number.
*Me walking into the nail salon* Hi, I'm here for my 3:45 appointment.
*Nail tech:* Ok, sweety, come and sit down.
*Me sits down in the chair*
*Nail tech:* You want long nail, short nail? Um, long nail. You want boyfriend?!! Yes, ma'am. Ok, let me work magic. Ok.
*gives me short nail* Bro, I asked for long nail, but you said BF, but u look lesbian.
*walks out without paying*
*Nail tech gives money to a customer* There u win.
*customer:* I told u she would.
Why were the Twin Towers mad? They wanted pepperoni, but instead, they got plane.
Why can't an orphan get 5 stars in GTA? Because they are not wanted.
Why can't an orphan be a criminal? Because they are not wanted.
I was digging in our garden and found a chest full of gold coins. I wanted to run straight home to tell my wife about it. Then I remembered why I was digging in our garden.
Me: Spanish teacher, why do we need to learn Spanish?
Teacher: Because you might go to Mexico and start a job.
Me: Why would I want to sell drugs?
Your mum is so fat, when the doctors did her x-ray, the doctor said to her, "I want your x-ray, not an elephant's x-ray!"