Want jokes
I want to be loved.
What do you call a Pokémon that wants to be a police officer?
Magic-cop!
Me: Hey, how are you?
Depression: I'm doing fine. We are just looking for a home :3
Insomnia: Mommy, can we get a home?
Anxiety: Insomnia, wait for mommy to finish.
Depression: Anyway, here is my resume!
Me: Okie, thank you. Ok... mhmmm... WOW! Okie, this is a nice resume! (Didn't Read it...)
Depression: Also, I have two more friends that want to move in too!
Me: Ok, and their names?
Depression: Their names are: PTSD and Trauma!
Me: Ok, they seem fine (Doesn't know about them)
Depression: Okie, here is the money (a penny :(). Thank you, we will call you if we need anything.
Me: Ok, see you soon! :3
Me now hates my life. :)
Wife: “I want another baby.”
Husband: “That’s a relief, I also really don’t like this one!”
What do 9-year-old girls want? To be ate again!
What do 7 year old girls want?
To be ate!
Why did the orphan become a criminal?
Because he wanted to actually be wanted.
Sister: I don't want to do it, but...
Me: No more butts! Butts are too yuck to be in this sentence.
You know how sometimes you want to listen to music?
But everything you listen to is just supremely unsatisfying, even if it's songs you usually love; they are just so unappealing, and you have no idea what you actually want to listen to.
A brother and a sister always kept fighting. One day the brother said, "You're adopted!"
Then the sister replies, "At least they wanted me!"
The brother yells back, "Well, at first, when they didn't know you'd turn out like this."
Want to hear an abortion joke, or any joke for that matter? You have that option, and you can thank your mother for that.
But that's a question that will never be heard by an aborted unborn baby, whose only option was death. And that's no joke.
I have a friend who doesn't have a dad.
He says: "You're useless, go to hell!"
Me: "Wait, why do you want me to join your dad?"
What does a disabled person want to be when they grow up? A stand-up comedian.
I want to be a pilot.
You: I want my mama.
Me: Soz, you can't even get one.
Where is the most dangerous place for a human being to be?
In the womb of a woman who wants to abort her unborn baby. 😢
Why are you mad because no one wants to adopt me?
I want to be like pizza so I can get cut into 8 pieces.
Do you want to wear my sombrero?
Or is that nacho style?
I was digging in our garden and found a chest full of gold coins. I wanted to run straight home to tell my wife about it.
Then I remembered why I’m digging in our garden.