Worst Jokes Ever
What happens after you eat at a combination Chinese-German restaurant?
An hour later, you're hungry—for power!
Life with depression is like a cheeseburger.
It's not good without the cheese.
Depressed caller: "I'm done with everything!"
Responder: "Please hang on!"
Isn't it ironic that the actually nice people tend to be suicidal?
Think about it: suicide exists to make sure bad people bother each other instead.
What do you call a black couple who's on welfare and food stamps?
Lay-Z and Freeyonce
If being near immortal was a normal thing i bet wanting to die wouuld've been too
Everyone: "Wow, you're so nice and perfect! Your life must be great!"
*Reality of having depression* Me: "Oh yeah, I guess. 😀"
I don't get people who treat you like shit and cross your boundaries, then are surprised when you have depression.
It's because of them after all. 🥰✨️
What’s the benefit of dating a homeless woman?
You can drop her off anywhere.
What do you call a rude math teacher with a lisp?
A mathive dick.
What's the difference between a female NCO and a zebra?
A zebra didn't have to suck and fuck to get it's stripes.
How do Chinese people name their kids?
They throw a wok down the stairs.
How do you get a transwoman to commit suicide?
Use he/him pronouns on him.
What did the Indian say when the pizza was delivered to him?
"Hey! Who puked on the frybread?"
What's Elizabeth Warren's nickname?
Pocahontas
Why didn't the oyster share its pearl?
Because it was a cunt.
What's a kidnapper's favorite shoe?
White Vans.
Did you know Yao Ming has the biggest penis in Chinese history? It measured in at nearly 5 inches!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator.
Did you try the digital egg padlock? Because it is very easy to crack the code.