Worst Jokes Ever
Brazil is a joke.
Bully: How’s your girlfriend?
Kid: I don’t have one. How are your parents?
Bully: *cries*
Kid: *Walks out of the orphanage*
What did the plate say to the other plate?
"I can lose 10 ugly pounds anytime I want -- I'll just cut off my head!"
Do you use humor to make light of your emotional eating and your weight? Make jokes about overeating and being fat as a way of getting along with other people? I was a Grand Champion at it.
What’s black, white, and red all over?
An embarrassed biracial guy.
"Go frick a cow!"
"I already fricked your mother."
What's the difference between an emo and a prisoner?
The prisoner.
"It looks like she went into Claire’s Boutique, fell on a sale rack, and said, ‘I’ll take it!’" — Bianca Del Rio, RuPaul’s Drag Race
You just might be why the middle finger was invented in the first place.
I thought of you today. It reminded me to take out the trash.
You are more disappointing than an unsalted pretzel.
I forgot the world revolves around you. My apologies! How silly of me.
"Go back to Party City, where you belong!" — Phi Phi O’Hara, RuPaul’s Drag Race.
You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the room.
Someday you'll go far.
So Little Johnny saw a robbery, so he tried to stop the robber. To the robber's surprise, he was amazed. So Johnny got 20 shots to the head. The End.
What is an orphan's favorite TV show?
"Alone."
I called an orphan's house, saying: "Are your parents home yet?"
He started crying.
What is Saturn's favorite song?
"7 Rings."
Why did Dan the orphan go to the orphanage?
Because he was! I couldn't make the homepage website!!