Yesterday I was in a wind storm. Today my ears hurt. I guess the wind was Ear-ittating.
Today I donated my watch, phone, and $500 to a poor guy. You wouldn’t believe the happiness I felt as he slid the pistol back into his pocket
Today was no fun. A rhino escaped from the zoo and ate two parents. And I lost my job as zookeeper.
My grandpa lost his toe today😔.....nvm we found it's in his TOEtruck
Hello everyone how is your day today?
Guy: Hi, how was your day today. Woman: Good! Guy: *Well I can’t ask her out cause she’s pregnant* Guy: How many months pregnant are you? Woman: What to you mean?!?! Also I’m not pregnant.
Today was the worst day ever. My Ex got hit by a truck... On the plus side my truck doesn't even have a dent.
Driving through the woods today I saw a boy with a bare behind.
A: Why did the orphan not come to school today? B: Because today we had a parent meetup
hi evyerone my mom got me an ipad today and this is really cool cna someone tell em what decapitation is
Hi how are you busy busy today and tomorrow I have to go home from home and walk home walk and a bike walk walk and a bike to school tomorrow night I have to have lunch with my mom and dad and I have dinner with you tonight
I decided today that I was going to do something with my life, something amazing, and I decided to punch a homeless man
Spend all night in a dark humour webpage
Go to orphanage today and read it to them And I'm sure if you go to school for disabled children, they should understand it
i really wasnt planning on going for a run today, but damn those cops came put of nowhere’s
No wonder some of the phones today have no home buttons. The makers were orphans.
What is the difference between the snow boots on the earth day today after dinner and walk home
I did a walk today and had fun today I did not have to go get my kids and get my new house 🏠 was good today I had fun I did a walk today I had fun today but I’m going to be at the car 🚘 when I’m at my car 🚘 was your night time is what time did
What school 🏫 did we say was today what did the snow ❄️ I love 💕
one day my friend said: i want tacos from Katie's, you? and i said no thanks and she left i never saw her again, today i remember that i saw her name on TV as one of the victems of suicide, then i remember her and I's moto: if i'm dieing you dieing with me you got no chouse, i NEVER ate tacos from Katie's again.
WHY IS THE MOON RED TODAY?The reason why the Moon takes on a reddish color during totality is a phenomenon called Rayleigh scattering. It is the same mechanism responsible for causing colorful sunrises and sunsets, and for the sky to look blue.
