They jokes
What's the difference between an emo and a banana?
They both hang like apples.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Cause they can't go to home base. 😈
Why can't an orphan get 5 stars in GTA? Because they are not wanted.
How do rappers stay warm in the winter?
They drop FIRE TRACKS.
Why do lesbians shop at Sports Authority? Because they don’t like dicks.
What’s the best thing about making out with dead girls?
They can’t say no.
Why are orphans so bad at poker?
They don’t know what a full house looks like.
What do alcoholics and amputees have in common?
They are both legless.
I once saw a one-handed man in a second-hand store. I told him, “I don’t think they have what you’re looking for, sir.”
Straight people ask why gays have such a good fashion sense.
They have to come out of the closet sometime.
Na, don't be mean to fat people. Oh wait, never mind, they can handle the weight.
How is a priest like a wristwatch?
They both start at 12.
I’ve been munching away on these new Tic Tacs recently and honestly, they are really good.
It’s a little strange how they came in a bottle labeled “Ibuprofen” though, and really, I’m starting to feel a little sick. The bottle’s almost empty though, so it’s time to get some more!
Jokes are like Indians.
They never die, they just get reincarnated.
What do Viagra and Disneyland have in common?
They both cause you to stand around for an hour waiting for a two-minute ride.
What do gay men and drug dealers have in common?
They both get a lot of crack.
Yo mama so fat, when she went to a dating service, they ended up matching her up with Pittsburgh.
Why are people from New York so bad at chess?
Because they quickly lose two towers (rooks).
Two terrorists walk into a bar.
The bartender asks what they are talking about. Terrorist 1 says, "We are going to kill 14k people and a donkey."
The Bartender asks, "Why a donkey?"
Then Terrorist 2 says, "See, I told you no one would care about the 14k people."
If you're bored, just go hit an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?