They jokes
Want to know what I do in my freetime?
Punch an orphan, cuz what are they going to do, tell their mom?
What does a blind man and your dick have in common?
They both can’t get up without a dog.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they all beat the room for being black.
Did you hear about the man who died of a Viagra overdose?
They couldn't close the casket.
Why are Germans so good at cleaning?
They have experience in ethnic cleansing.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said, "I know you wanna." Jack undressed, and she pulled up her dress so they could have some fun. But stupid Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a son.
What’s the difference between a priest and target?
Nothing, they both have children’s pants half off.
What do an Olympic silver medalist and a Catholic priest have in common?
A: They both come in a little behind.
What do a Catholic priest and an Olympic silver medalist have in common? A: They both come in a little behind.
Three men were lost in the desert and found a genie who granted each of them a wish.
The 1st man wished he was home with his family. The 2nd man wished he was home with his family, and the 3rd man wished they were all back together again.
My elderly relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying, “You’ll be next!”
They soon stopped though, once I started doing the same to them at funerals.
Teacher says, "Okay class, today we're gonna talk about what everyone wants to be when they grow up." Little Johnny, how about you go first."
Little Jonny: "I want to be a speed bump when I grow up!"
Why can't orphans be gay?
They have no one to call "daddy".
Why do orphans die when a tornado comes?
They don't have parents to protect them.
What's the similarities between Spiderman and a homeless person?
They both have no way home!
A pregnant wife and her husband were in a hospital as she was in labor. The doctor suggested using a machine that transfers the birth pains from the mother to the father. They agree, so the machine is used. 40%, the husband feels nothing, 70% still not feeling anything, 100%, nothing.
The doctor says it must be broken. When the pair return home, the milkman is dead in the front yard.
Why are orphans lucky?
Because they can get in trouble and nobody can tell their parents.
Why don't humans eat raw meat? Because they use technology to cry about raw meat is good. Go and leave, bro, I'm going to eat sushi.
Why do orphans not care about sleep? Because they have no one to wake up to.
Who needs sex when they have Valorant?