Women are like iPhones, you have to touch them all over before they respond. Men are like Blackberrys, rub one ball and everything moves!
Q: How do u make an emo kid happy
A: give them a happy meal
How do you confuse a blonde? Tell them to stand in the corner in a round room
If anyone ever makes a time machine, please make a bunker for Hitler/the Nazis and send them to 2050. I want to see who would die first, future us or them.
What do the Twin Towers and gender have in common? There used to be two of them, but now it's a sensitive topic.
Like if you listen to Kidd G.
Comment if you listen to Polo G.
Share if you listen to NBA Youngboy.
Do all if you listen to all of them and you all of them if Kobe Bryant is a legend.
[Them]: "Don't you think you'll feel ashamed of all the suicide jokes you've made when you get older?"
[Me]: "When I what?" 0-0
What do your girlfriend and a pool have in common? They both cost a lot of money for the amount of time you’re inside them.
What did the sex offender frog say to the other sex offender frog when a hot frog passed them?
Rrrrrapeit!
What's the difference between and apple and an orphan? One of them gets picked.
(True story) Today I was bringing some tortilla chips upstairs for some chips and dip, and I dropped them, so my mom goes “Oh, now they’re broken.”
And I took an opportunity to make a pun, so I said, “No, they’re just chipped.”
Lesbians when the GPS asks them to go straight.
gay people when the GPS ask them to go straight
The reason they attacked the towers is because the terrorists thought the towers were giant middle fingers pointed at them. What silly saudis!
When my family goes to weddings, my senior relatives tell me things like “You’re next!” So I started doing the same to them at funerals.
Men should provide their disobedient daughters with their own "milk" instead of letting them use the mother. That will teach those bitches some respect for men. It may even help them get laid later on in life.
Someone I know is an ant. I feel like a mountain to them.
What do boobs and toys have in common?
They were both originally made for kids, but daddies end up playing with them.
Why is September 11th the best birthday ever? No one forgets it :)
A man saw a lady with big breasts. He asked, "Excuse me, can I bite your breasts for $1000?" She agrees, so they go to a secluded corner. She opens her blouse and the man puts his face in her breasts for 10 minutes. Eventually, the lady asks, "Aren't you gonna bite them?" He replies, "No, it's too expensive."
