Their jokes

Why do kids with cancer hate their birthday?

They don't know if they'll be alive to see it.

How are feminists different from gorillas? At least gorillas don't abort their own children.

Bad joke: Why is it easy to bully orphans? Because what are they going to do, tell their parents?

What do rapists like to suck?

The life out of their victim.

Two people about to have sex realize they have no lube.

In their desperate, horny haste, they looked for the nearest "Downy" and asked it, "Speak into my hand."

Upon their return to the bed, they regretted it immediately because his dick just stayed down...

What's an orphan's favorite toy?

A boomerang, because it came back unlike their parents.

If cancer was a person I’d shake their hand and say: "Thank you for your service."

Sorry if it’s too far, but don’t come here if you can’t take it.

Why do people not adhere to the corona measures?

Because they hate their lives and want to die.

My parents came back from their vacation in Florida, and all I got is this lousy nursemaid from Miami named mammie.

You can make fun of adopted kids all you want. What are they going to do, tell their parents on you? Lol.

How do you become with NATO? Promise no more world wars by secretly performing military practices behind their back.

Iran? More like tin can, cause we’re going to kick their teeth in, am I right?

Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be Wanted.

Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is.

I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.

What do you call an orphan’s family reunion? Me time.

Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family.

What is an orphan’s least favorite song? "We are Family."

What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? "Family Guy."

What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? "Meet the Parents."

What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music? House.

Next: Inappropriate Jokes

What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.

What’s an orphan’s favorite band? Foster the People.

What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.

Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms.

What beer do orphans drink? Foster’s.

Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.

What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin.

Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it’s the only love they get.

Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away?

It’s like Sonic always says, “If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?”

Want to know something? Jason and Michael Myers had to watch their family while they have to live forever. That's why they kill; they're trying to make people experience what they did.

Your hairline is so curved that McDonald's hired you to be their "M."

Why don't molestation victims speak up about their trauma? Because it's a touchy topic.

I hate when people leave their cars running, especially in the summer.

I'm like, "You got Tracy Latimer in there or something?"

Why can't orphans have a large bag of chips? Because they're family sized.

What do children with cancer and Russian soldiers have in common? Their life doesn't last long.