Their jokes

Why would doors do well on social media?

Everyone looks for their handles.

Yo mama so fat when she goes to the shoe store, she needs to take their advice and get XXXXL.

What's the similarity between a pepperoni pizza and Freddy Krueger?

They both have red circles on their bodies.

What does a squirrel eat? Deez Nutz in their mouth.

I am so disappointed in this race.

Brown skinned street shitters, goddamn, the lowest of the low southeast Asians, lazy monkey pig-dog duck fetus eating rice brainlets always on their phones, no IQ, ugly, uncivilized untermensch subhumans.

What do you call crabs that do not share their food?

They are shellfish! (ノ≧∀≦)ノ

Why couldn't people have their phone on airplane mode during 9/11?

Because their phone exploded the towers.

When does a dyslexic person know when they've spelt their address wrong?

When it fails to turn up.

Sonic says if you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?

I had a party the other day. I made sure there were vegan options. They make do or fuck off.

Three good friends decided to meet in their favorite caffe.

The meetup was a successful one, because they all enjoyed themselves.

What's the best part about beating up an orphan?

They can't tell their parents.

My friend tried to sleep on napkins.

I guess that's why they're called NAP-kins.

They laughed at my crayon drawing.

So I laughed at their chalk outline.

Why would you never donate to crabs?

Because they're shellfish!

When you're mad, you might as well just punch an orphan because what can they do, tell their parents?

A sibling went up to their other sibling and said, "Dad said you're adopted."

The other sibling said, "You are, too."

Then the first sibling goes, "No, I'm not."

And the sibling says, "We're twins."

The other kid goes, "And you're adopted... oh."

What do cells call their friends with? A cell phone.

Where do dogs go when their tails fall off?

To the retail store.

Q: Why do men say "ladies first?"

A: So they can look at their a**.