The jokes

Viola

What’s the difference between a violin and a viola?

The viola burns longer.

Bbc

Why’s BBC called BBC?

The dude’s shlong gets bigger every time he says n-

Orphan

What’s the difference between a dog and parents?

If an orphan calls their name, only the dog comes back.

Chicken

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Because he wanted to get to the other side.

Cannibal

What does the woman say to the cannibal at the fashion show?

"Who are you wearing?"

Candy

When you ask your mom for candy but you grab from the wrong drawer...

Baby

"Rock-a-bye baby on the treetop, When the wind blows, the baby will drop. Then the baby will lay on the ground, Not moving a muscle, not making a sound."

Tree

How does a tree access the internet?

By logging in and branching out!

Emo

Why can’t the emo play in trees? They’ll leave ‘em hanging.

Emo

Why was the emo person dead inside?

Because I stole their insides.

Orphan

Why can't orphans play football?

Because they can't be on the home team.

Creep

What did the creep do when the woman said, “Make yourself at home?”

He hid in her attic.

Oreo

Why did the emo kid like the all black Oreos?

'Cause they're dark.