The jokes
Where does Hitler look first when he loses something? The attic.
Don't make fun of the emo kid, or he's gonna bring his friends and you gotta fight the Suicide Squad.
Say what you want about Hitler, at least he got the trains to run on time.
The Stigg is a joke.
What was the drug addict's favorite nursery rhyme?
I'm a little crack pot short and stout, put that crack pipe in my mouth, sell my body or sell my couch, get that lighter and smoke me out!
Memes
Yo mama so slow, she took nine months to make the joke. Thank god mine only took 6.
What is the best way to get gum out of your hair?
Cancer.
Yo mama so fat, when she skips a meal, the stock market drops.
What passengers were happy that the Titanic sank?
The lobsters in the kitchen.
What's the favorite song of an Emo?
"Chain Hang Low."
What did the orphan say to his parents?
I'm tripping balls right now!
Papyrus: Well come to the underground.
Sans: How was your falls?
Papyrus: G-g-good luck eve-ever ge-getting o-out.
Sans: Give me your balls!
Today at the bank, an old lady asked me to help her check her balance.
So I pushed her over.
Someone went up to an orphan and asked him why he was talking to the air. He said he was talking to his mom.
What are the similarities between the twin towers and my ex?
They both went down on my dad.
What is the opposite of Progress?
Congress.
I don’t usually tell 9/11 jokes, they usually crash and burn.
You can sink the Titanic like you can drive a bike. Not a joke.
My mom said, "Take out the trash," but I couldn't find you.
Give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a few hours.
Set him on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.