The jokes

Why did the rapper oil up his notepad?

In case he needed to DROP some FREESTYLE NOTES!

Why did the rapper bring a dictionary to the party?

So he could drop some WORDPLAY.

I tried to get into an emo bar, but I didn't make the cut.

Normally the reason you don't get a knife when you ask for one is because the person you asked is emo.

What's the most embarrassing thing about locking your keys in the car outside a pregnancy care center?

Having to go inside and ask for a coat hanger.

Q. What's the difference between an abortion clinic and Uber Eats?

Abortion clinics don't do deliveries.

So, three guys are walking carefully into a bar.

The bartender said, "What can I get you, gentlemen?"

Did you hear about the man who stole a calendar?

He got 12 months.

Worst joke ever.

I worked at a calendar factory, but I got the sack for taking a few days off!

What's the difference between Chaplin and a politician in a wheelchair?

Chaplin does stand-up comedy, and the politician does sit-down... comedy.

What happened to Peter Pan when he jumped off the Twin Towers?

He Neverland.

The 11th of September is considered 9/11 in America. The Twin Towers fell on 9/11 in 2001, but to call an emergency in America, you dial 911! 😮 You could say they dialed that correctly.

The last time I ever made a joke was just now.

Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 9.

But why is 10 scared? Because he is in the middle of 9/11.

"The truest things ARE the funniest things."

-Lollipop from JacknJellify, the BFDI series.

Go to the replies, look at the top and it will say "in your mum."

What's the difference between a low tide and your hairline?

Nothing, they're both receding.

If an apple and a depressed kid fall out of a tree, which one hits the ground first? The apple.

The kid just hangs there.

If Earth is the 3rd planet from the sun, does that mean that every country is a 3rd world country?

If the sun is in space, then why is there light on Earth, but not in space?