The jokes

My grandfather said my generation relies too much on the latest technology. So I unplugged his life support.

I know this is supposed to be an emo joke, but does anyone want to play Rocket League?

I'm on PS4, by the way!

My name: Box3d_by_Clapped

One day, a lady and her husband were talking and it was time for dinner. He got up and sat at the dining room table, and the lady brought the plate of food in and she sat it down in front of him. "What's this?" he said. The lady said, "A piece of shit...honey! Want some water to drink?"

What’s the difference between your wife and a light switch?

I don’t turn on a light switch.

Mom: “Guess where I’m taking you, son!”

Son: “To the playground?”

Mom: “No, to the morgue.”

What's the difference between me and the rest of America?

I love one and hate the other.

I'm jealous of the people who never met you.

Bro, my forehead is so big whenever I need to find something on it, I need the exact coordinates.

So, when I'm about to take a shower, my mom says, "Take a shower." When I'm about to take out the trash, my mom says, "Take out the trash."

Why did they put the Petronas towers? Eh, you do you.

I got carded at a liquor store, and my Blockbuster card accidentally fell out. The cashier said, "Never mind."

Have you seen the Justin meme?

Yeah, the ones that cracked at Fortnite?

Just-in time for deez nuts.

Bruh.

But actually, it's a parody.

Wait, actually?

Parodiesnuts (pair of deez nuts).

It's important to have a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between "antidote" and "anecdote," one of my best friends would still be alive.

A boy couldn't walk normally because his pants were huge, and when he went to school, the people there made so many jokes about him that he died.

IT'S NOT TRUE, JUST A FAKE JOKE, DON'T WORRY!

Your mom was so fat that she couldn't have a man and couldn't go through the door.

I'M JOKING, DON'T GET MAD!

Do you know what Fortnite was like before season 2 chapter 3? They put the Foundation / The Rock in the water where aliens were that season.

Your mom uses the equator as a belt.

Yo momma so fat that when she fell, I didn't laugh, but the floor cracked up.

HELP! HELP!

TELL THE PRIEST TO STOP TICKLING ME!

Why did the kid get grounded? Because he was always lion.