The jokes

Poo

Little Jim's friend told him that if he farts, he will give him a tenner. Little Jim tries to fart, but he poos himself, and he is bullied until he puts the poo on the bullies' face.

Hotdog

What did Mrs. Hotdog join after Mr. Hotdog joined LGBBQ+? The LGBBQ++ premium.

Sonic

Why was Sonic fast?

To be rolling around at the speed of sound, got places to go, gotta follow my lead.

Race

I am so disappointed in this race.

Brown skinned street shitters, goddamn, the lowest of the low southeast Asians, lazy monkey pig-dog duck fetus eating rice brainlets always on their phones, no IQ, ugly, uncivilized untermensch subhumans.

Condom

Why is bungee jumping similar to a condom?

Because if the rubber snaps, you're fucked.

Orphan

What will happen if orphans use an iPhone?

They can't find the home button.

Brother

My brother tried to hit this guy with a plane and but hit the Twin Towers.

Hairline

Is it just me, or can I see the Roman Empire from how far back your hairline goes?

Twin Towers

Why were the Twin Towers angry on 9/11?

Because they ordered a pepperoni pizza, but all they got instead was plane.

Emo

I took my friend skydiving once, and he jumped out of the plane without a parachute. Then I remembered he was emo.

Spectrum

If someone has a hyperfixation with drawing and playing, does that mean they are on the "artism" spectrum?

Cat

How do you make a cat sound like a dog? Pour gasoline on it, then light it on fire and it will go "WOOF!"

How do you make a dog sound like a cat? Put it in the deep freeze until frozen solid, then run it through an electric saw and it will go "MMMRROWWWWWW!"

Hairline

NEWS: A man kidnapped a 13-year-old girl.

MOM OF GIRL: The man had a shady face and a receding hairline.

Light

My mom interrupted my gaming session to tell me to hang up the lights.

I hung something else instead.

Letter

Why does nobody talk to the letter G?

Because it's always in the middle of awkward!

Life

Cereal is like... breakfast soup made out of corn flakes.

Ketchup is like... a smoothie because of the tomato.

Coffee is like... a bean drink energizer.

My life is like... the shoe rack-

Mama

Yo mama so strict that when Ponyboy told her that Darry hit him, she called the cops on Darry.