The jokes
Why did the nut go to the bank?
To cashew its check.
My wife said to me, "You really have no sense of direction, do you?"
I said, "Where the fuck did that come from?!"
What do you call a nut who loves the game of chess?
A chess-nut.
What did the guest say when he arrived at the peanut butter's dinner party?
“Nice spread!”
What happened to the man who turned into a pistachio?
He became a shell of who he once was.
Who answers the door at the peanut mansion?
The peanut butler.
You must be rich! You've got all the cashews.
This joke here is the worst.
The circular saw asked the chainsaw, "When am I as big as you?"
The chainsaw would answer with, "When you cut down some things in your life. Like your owner."
The circular saw would reply with, "What?"
I’m part of the anti anime association, but I’m starting to like anime. What do I do?
And for the joke: What do you call a dog with no back legs and a pair of metal balls? Sparky.
What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common? The Wall was their last big hit.
In the year 2020, who were the biggest enemies?
Coronavirus and toilet paper.
I saw a little kid cry. I went up to him and asked where his parents were. Jeez, I love working at the orphanage!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Why is Bill the bad guy?
Monica wanted to suck dick.
What's the difference between orphans and apples? Apples get picked.
Reminder: Check the fridge, but remember nothing's in there.
I went to a funeral to revive my dead grandmother with the Reboot Card, but my family was upset!
Roses are red, violets are blue, Alexander Boris de Pfeffel had wine and cheese while your loved ones died in the ICU.
Hey, what do you call a beta simp?
You call me the beta simp.