The jokes
A dwarf walks into a bar.
He asks for a shot of whiskey. The bartender gives him the 🥃, and it turns into a gallon of whiskey. The bartender sees this and takes it back, and it turns back into a shot of whiskey.
Why did the koala cross the road?
To get to the big tree.
What is green and blue?
Grass and the sky.
Why did the kid go in the guy's van?
Answer: He thought he was being adopted.
What is a type of cancer that:
Affects you. Is caused by a device. Is annoying. People won't stop talking about it?
Easy, the answer is Fortnite.
Literally no one: Why can't you hear the pterodactyl?
Random person: I don't know.
No one: BECAUSE THEY ARE EXTINCT!
Random person: Ha, cool, I guess.
Why did the blonde run outside naked?
She thought the steam was a gas leak.
Where do the Borg eat fast food?
Borger King.
Yo mama so fat, she fell into a pond and all the fish drowned.
We got Spider-Man Homecoming, Spider-Man Far from Home, then Spider-Man No Way Home, considering society’s current state and how shitty 2023 is, the next movie is probably gonna be Spider-Man Homosexual.
Riddler: Riddle me this, are you scared of the big black?
Person: Big black what?
Riddler: ...
Person: I'm scared of what you mean because you won't tell me what you mean.
Why did the fat rape victim cross the road?
To block traffic.
1950: In the future there will be flying cars.
2018: Pewdiepie shuts down Shane Dawson.
I'm thinking of getting a job as a gardener--pushing up the daisies!
Roses are red, my name is Dan...
TDM, I have a gun, GET IN THE VAN!
Why do midgets need a lot of books at school?
So they can reach the top of the desk.
There were 500 bricks on a plane. One fell off.
Little Sally was crossing a river full of crocodiles. How did she survive the river? She had a gun. When she got out of the river, she died. Why? Because a brick fell on her head.
I slip on the wet floor, haha silly water :)
-Kachow!!!!!!!!!!!
-LMQ, You know what comes before lighting? THUNDER KACHIGA
5 Little Monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said... "Wait, why are there mines all over the floor?"
A penguin walks into a bar. The bartender says, "So what will it be this time?" The penguin doesn't answer because it's a penguin.