Newest Target Jokes - Worst Jokes Ever

me when I call it Tar-jay
instead of Target

Last year, I gave my brother a BB gun for his birthday, he gave me a T-shirt with a bullseye on it. I asked him what was the bullseye for he said target practice

In Israel, they don't have Walmarts; they only have Targets.

Obesity kills thousands of times more Americans than shooting does, which teaches us an important lesson:

Shooters do poorly given the size of their targets.

Ignore line & ovals

Faisal Saeed Al Mutar
20 hrs.
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It must be incredibly frustrating as an Islamic terrorist not to have your views
and motives taken seriously by the societies you terrorize, even after you
have explicitly and repeatedly stated them. Even worse, those on the
regressive left, in their endless capacity for masochism and self-loathing,
have attempted to shift blame inwardly on themselves, denying the terrorists
even the satisfaction of claiming responsibility.
It's like a bad Monty Python sketch:
"We did this because our holy texts exhort us to to do it."
"No you didn't."
"Wait, what? Yes we did..."
"No, this has nothing to do with religion. You guys are just using religion as a
front for social and geopolitical reasons."
"WHAT!? Did you even read our official statement? We give explicit Quranic
justification. This is jihad, a hely crusade against pagans, blasphemers, and
disbelievers."
"No, this is definitely not a Muslim thing. You guys are not true Muslims, and
you defame a great religion by saying so."
Huh!? Who are you to tell us we're not true Muslims!? Islam is literally at the
core of everything we do, and we have implemented the truest most literal
and honest interpretation of its founding texts. It is our very reason for being."
"Nope. We created you. We installed a social and economic system that
alienates and disenfranchises you, and that's why you did this. We're sorry."
"What? Why are you apologizing? We just slaughtered you mercilessly in the
streets. We targeted unwitting civilians - disenfranchisement doesn't even
enter into it!"
"Listen, it's our fault. We don't blame you for feeling unwelcome and lashing
out."
"Seriously, stop taking credit for this! We worked really hard to pull this off,
and we're not going to let you take it away from us."
"No, we nourished your extremism. We accept full blame."
"OMG, how many people do we have to kill around here to finally get our
message across?"

:/

"Our target market is men and
women, ages 18-75."
Marketing Agency:
WHAT?

Why does the military recruit orphans? Because homing missiles don’t target them

What’s the difference between a feminist and a school shooter

A school shooter actually makes an impact on its targets

Why do people hate jokes about the World Trade Center? Because its an easy target.

If you hit a Indian person on the forehead with a dart is it considered a bullseye?

People should've recognized that Jared Fogle was a sick offender by one coded Subway Sandwich; he normally claimed to kids he ate the sweet onion chicken teriyaki when it was the tuna sub.

Tuna sub was the message of the target to the kid since tuna sub put together makes tunasub and the truth comes when you spell it in reverse (busanut)!

What's the difference between an Afghan kindergarten and a military target? The drone guy didn't know either.

me when I call it Tar-jay
instead of Target
O
me when i call it COVID-19 instead of
the rona

What's one thing a homing missle can't kill?

An orphan.

I don’t know why I’m in jail so basically I was at a gun range and we were suppose to hit the targets even though I hit it

Target does what??!!!
O
target
STAPLES
ALDI
DICK'S
boredpanda.com

I was reading this in class and laughed at loud, i had to clear all my history of jokes

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little
bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the
Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids
on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am
trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire
US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another
target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of
which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my
fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that
shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we
speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across
the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better
prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the
pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead,
kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over
seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands.
Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I
have access to the entire arsenal of the United States
Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your
miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If
only you could have known what unholy retribution your
little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you,
maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you
couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you
goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown
in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.

My aim is cursed one of my angry birds hit a field

Why doesn't Iran have an Walmarts? Because they have a Target at every corner.

Holy fucking shit Addison watersharky Gwen and all of you other cringelords I swear to god I I hear one more thing about “please be kind no bullying on the internet” I will actually shoot my local school. You may not know since you are only 8yrs old or whatever but the world is not kind. It’s full of sick people out to beat others and the only way to stay safe is to beat them. So even if you think you are spreading kindness it’s just gonna make you a target. So just stfu and keep your “please be kind “messages to yourselves