I haven't talked to my wife in three weeks. -- I didn't want to interrupt her.
My girlfriend treats me like God. -- She ignores my existence and only talks to me when she needs something.
I was going to join the debating team
...but someone talked me out of it.
A guy finds a genie...
He says, "I wish I was better at talking to women."
"Poof!" the genie says, "You're gay!"
Two men were talking about their wives. The first man says, "My wife is an angel." The second man says, "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
