Swearing Jokes

In response to a buddy saying they joined a golf club:

“Jfc ****, you’ve gone softer than your old man’s dick after your mom suggests a romantic night in! I swear to god you’re so fucking bougie.” (Pause) “Oh I forgot to tell you, while you were gone I got a weird call for you... Some Jeff guy? Said something about a loan...” “Jeff who?” “Bezos.”

swear ur eyebrows have attachment issues, they're touching rn

What did the swearing hen say?

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK! (It's cluck)

What did the cussing rooster say?

Cock-a-poo-dle phew!

Prince don't listen to that Princess she is a fake I swear. I am the real Gwen.

swear i witnessed ur nana fall down the stairs

L

Why did the duck walk across the road I lost my pecker

personally i think putting beans on toast is better that bullets in children

The teacher was terrified to hear Little Johnny swear. “I never want you to use language like that again. Where on earth did you pick it up?” “From my father.” said Johnny. “Well, he should be ashamed of himself. And it’s no reason for you to talk like that. You don’t even know what it means.” “I do.” said Johnny. “It means the car won’t start.”

Pastor: I don’t normally swear but tonight I am going to just for the Halibut!

Gwen I am not gay their is some stupid faker online! I SWEAR ON MY LIFE THAT I AM NOT! btw If I was gay then why are am I chatting and dating a girl!

want to hear a joke? i swear it isn't about my life again-

my mom and dad made a joke together and called it 'yeetsu' (me)

Why did the cow cross the road?? To go to the Mooovies

i swear everytime i walk past a guy they stare at my ass i always keep wondering why it hurts so much

um please do not swear there is no need could you maybe just find clean jokes.

My and my penis never truly understood the words Booby traps until we met the x wife, Gods gift of self will was working fine until my penis went hard and my mind went blank and God started laughing and I swear I herd him say Booby trap as he walked away! True story