Why don't Chinese people play cricket?
Because they ate all the bats!
What's the difference between when I opened the window in a car wash and when Kawhi Leonard did it? At least my dad didn't get shot in the eye.
Why was Liverpool better than Man United? We won 5-0, and you have a sex offender on your team.
South's losing to Broncos. 😹
It's about bottling.
It's about crying.
I stay finished, I fake retire.
Put in the diving.
Put in the ghosting
And take my fake trophies.
Eibar and Bolivia in my veins.
My Barcelona banged by Bayern.
I bottle the game, so what's my farmer's name? (Pessi)
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they have no home to run to!
Why didn't the dog want to play football??
'Cause he was a boxer!
How do baseballs communicate?
They touch base!
I was in the Sahara Desert, dying of thirst. Thankfully, Pionel Pessi, the debut man, came to my rescue👨🚒. He brought in 100's of helicopters filled with bottles to quench my thirst. I asked him how he had so many bottles; "big games," he replied. Thanks for saving my life, my idol.