SOS jokes

Depression sucks, and so do you.

Why are orphans so bad at dodgeball?

Because nobody misses them.

Your mama's so fat when she sat on the toilet, the toilet said, "A, B, C, D, E, F, G, get your fat ass off of me!"

Why are orphans so good at GTA?

Because they're not wanted.

Yo forehead so big, an airplane can use that as a runway!

I wanted to open a brothel in the monastery, but the slogan: "Fist some Christs" was, unfortunately, not so well received.

Why did the orphan go to church?

So he had someone to call Father.

Yo mama so dumb, when Fox Five said it's chilly outside, she brought a bowlllllll!

You're so fat, when people see you running, they can't help but yell out, "Keep running!"

Your momma's so fat, when I went to suck her titties, I got a mouth full of knee.

She said you can twerk, so I put her in a tractor and put her to work. She got mad at me and said, "There's no good men," but I gave her a kob and equal pay!

Yo dad's so stupid, he came back after he got the milk.

"Sticks and stones break my bones."

A crowbar does it so much quicker.

Joe mama so fat, she fell on both sides of the bed.

Little Johnny sits on a chair. He notices he is sitting on something. Then he sees a plastic di**. He asks his mom, "What's that?" and Mom didn't know, so when his dad comes home from work, he sees him with the plastic di** and says, "Son, why you messing with my personal toy?"

Why do orphans play GTA so much?

Because they can be wanted for once.

Yo mama is so ugly that when she went through a face ID, it didn't think she was human.

"Disease" technically means "lack of ease," so if a girl is hard to get, call her a disease.

That's what Elliot Rodger did.

My wife and I just decided we don't want to have children.

So if anyone wants them, our contact information is below.

I wish my nails were emo so that they would cut themselves.