I don't really trust the press. Sometimes they wear badges that say 'press', but if you press those badges they just fall over all surprised.
Sometimes I just wake up in the morning and think damn better luck next time
Q: Sex is great, only your mate can sometimes be a little nuts!
( I am still a single young virgin )
Son:Daddy? Dad: Why tf do you keep calling me daddy, Your 11 years old feminine gay hoe Son: Whoa!? Daddy whats that Dad: Wtf are you talking about? Son: Your dick has it goten more tastier? Son: Ooh... I..... Just.... Wanna.... Sssuuc Dad: ooh nope im not havin a gay hoe's feind in my house no quit lookin at my dick you need some pussy Son: eeeeeewwwwwwwwwww nooooo plz no plz Dad: Shut the fuck up: ehr em Mom: What the fugde is going on? Dad: Our sons a gay bitch Mom Launguage' so? i need to teach him how to like a girl huh? Dad: Yes Ma'am Plz Mom: Okay Mom: Herman Getch'er gay ass in my bed but naked i'll be there in 10 Son: wha whey huh ur gonna... wtf?!?!?!?? Mom: Quit cursing im gonna fuck u extra hard!! Son: Ewww imm gonna fuck my mom even though she is hot sexy but eeewwww Mom: Shut it!!!, or imma recordid and *fliped her hair taking off her panies(pussy naked)* And show this to ur gay fuck friends! Son: Huh Son: Mom FUCK U* Mom: Okay baby imma fuck u in a minute lemme tak my bra off Son:UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHH Son: moms are the worst are they? Me no there not sometimes but i love them teheheteheh
pls help my dad is a addict he wont stop and he eats my food. Sometimes i think should i kill him but nah he will go down with the others who did that too.
I went to a sleepover at my best friend's house. He lives with his grandpa and little brother, his mom and dad. His little brother likes to run around the house naked sometimes. I cant help but notice his grandpa always looks up when he does.
Just all us depressed people joking about our depressed lives, we should hang out sometime
2 weeks here
What do dicks and popsicles have in common?
They both like to be sucked on and they sometimes choke you.
My diet consists of Blood Pudding, I love it and have it for breakfast, lunch and dinner, my secret ingredient though?
It consists of the blood and insides of my victims, it’s a bit chunky sometimes, some bits chewy, some bits hard
But it’s a hearty meal
Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies.
Sometimes I feel ugly but then I think of my sister
I put my leg up in the air sometimes, singing ayo, I'm a flamingo...
I sometimes want rampage, but what good would that do?
I look for a way out, but there's not even a light shining through.
The times where all is dark, are the times that I need a mark.
Though people say that nobody will care, the truth is: there's always one who's fair.
That person may not be the one you expect, but I am here with a passion to redirect.
Once there was a time where I tried to end it all, because I only looked on the dark side.
Truth was I wanted to be heard, to be respected, to let someone know.
But that was in the past and this isn't about my dark ride, it's time for others to know that only a few words, can extinguish a glow.
Sometimes i have this incredible urge to grab a child from school and yell
"IM YOU FROM THE FUTURE"
What's both red, white and sometimes purple My arms...
Doin your mom doin doin your mom Doin your mom doin doin your mom Doin doin your mom doin doin your mom You know we straight with doin your mom I like your mamas big butt, and I cannot lie. You other brothers can’t deny that she’s fly. We make sexy time, yes and every night I tap that. She saw me butt-naked, now she thinks I’m half black. But your moms the best, the super M.I.L.F. Cause she loves to toss the salad even though she ain’t a chef And I blame it on the al-al-al-cohol But If I were you, I wouldn’t kiss your mom on the mouth at all. She likes the Donkey-Punch. She likes the Dirty Sanchez. Sometimes she even likes to fool around in your bed. She likes rough sex with handcuffs and I’ll be honest She likes me to Chris Brown her when she acts like Rihanna. She’s so therapeutic. When I need to cure my restlessness I br-br-br-br-br-br-br-br motorboat your moms breastestess. I didn’t wanna tell you, but I had to write this song Cause I’m in your house every night doin your mo-om. Doin your mom doin doin your mom Doin your mom doin doin your mom Doin doin your mom doin doin your mom You know we straight with doin your mom Doin your mom doin doin your mom Doin your mom doin doin your mom Doin doin your mom doin doin your mom You know we straight with doin your mom I’m havin sex with your mother That makes me better than you. I’m havin sex with your mother That makes me better than you. Doin your mom doin doin your mom Doin your mom doin doin your mom Doin doin your mom doin doin your mom You know we straight with doin your mom Doin your mom doin doin your mom Doin your mom doin doin your mom Doin doin your mom doin doin your mom You know we straight with doin your mom
She likes the Donkey-Punch. She likes the Dirty Sanchez. Sometimes she even likes to fool around in your bed!
Sometimes i wish my gf was here that way we could have some fun in my bed, the I realize she's right across the hall. (SWEET HOME ALABAMA)!!
Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?" Man: "Yes!" Reporter: "Name?" Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim." Reporter: "Sex?" Man: "Three to five times a week." Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?" Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel." Reporter: "Holy cow!" Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general." Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?" Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style." Reporter: "Oh dear!" Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."
yo'mama sometimes always happens to let you know you're back in New York -- like the way people order in a restaurant: 'Could you take my order before Jesus gets back? What's the matter with you? I've evolved into another species here, you understand? I can't eat clam chowder no more. I gotta see the cyborg menu, you understand?'
