Hello, anybody, I've just shot somebody, I did it on purpose
How did stephen hawking die? Somebody threw an EMP at him
If you wanna hit somebody, hit an orfan, what are they gonna do... tel their parents
Somebody asked me whats that on your arm I just said "My cats got ocd"
Why is Donald Trump under so much stress. Because he signed up to be on an album where somebody says no love for the rich on it.
This morning I was in the kitchen and I saw some a whole bunch of leftovers brownies made from scratch i just taste one and spit it out because somebody put some godamn weed in them what the fuck.
a girl looked in the fridge she got mad that somebody at the last ice cream cone she ran into her sisters room and said this is why your fat the fell down the stairs good thing she had that belly roll to save her.
I would create an orphan website..... But you need a home page to do that. (since somebody stole this joke before)🤷♀️
I was at the beach today, and there was a big wave. Somebody went, damn that crashed harder than the twin towers. Jack may have survived the towers, but not the crash
How do you call somebody who has bought a Corona? A Cor-owner.
fun fact: pringles are named pringles because somebody decided to name them pringles
Hi hunter. Emilly wrote this
Why do orphans love having sex?
Becuase They can finally call somebody daddy.
Jesus shows up and says you’ve got to go to church. You follow him in and under their breath it sounds like somebody says you steal and you say in your mind knowing you have before I’m sorry then somebody caughs and under their breath it sounds like they say again you steal so you whisper quietly I’m sorry... ...then somebody in German says shoot that son of a bitch
A homeless man sits in front of a home Depot, a man walking out of the store hands him some money and asks "Why are you in front of the home Depot?" And the man says "Isn't it obvious? Hoping somebody accidentally drops the house they just bought."
What's a good way to masturbate???
Get somebody to do it for u
Somebody told me chemistry joke. I thought it was sodium funny, I slapped my neon that one.
(some kid crying because hes an orphan and kids are bulling him) teacher:HEY i was a orphan to so if you bully him your basicly trying to bully me too me:OOF teacher:now is somebody not here? me:your parents
All my life I wanted to be somebody. I wanted to achieve something. Now, after messing up my life at every possible chance, I finally realize that what I really want is to have been someone after following through with one thing.
If somebody gives you Lemons,cut them in half and do the Juice in his eyes.
Somebody keeps sending me flowers with their heads cut off.
I think I'm being stalked.
