Size jokes
Yo mama so fat, when she stepped on the scale it said, "To Be Continued."
Your mom is FAAAAAAAAAT as FUCK.
Your forehead is so big that you dream on IMAX.
Ur mom is so fat that when she came to the front door, she was already at the back door.
Yo mama so fat, when she was just there, she made the whole earth go back to the ice age!
Yo mama so fat, her birth certificate was an apology letter.
Someone: "I got chickens out there vibin'."
Me: "What? Oh, you mean those over-sized chickens that just show an example of you in real life?"
Someone: . . .
Why do orphans hate family-size candy?
Because they can't share it with their family.
I got sent to the principal's office for giving an orphan kid a family-size pack.
Like if you're short.
Your mom is so fat that when she saw Moby Dick, she said, "We are family... even though you're bigger than me."
Yo mama so fat, when she fell I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.
Why do most clips for automatic weapons have 32 bullets?
That's usually how many kids are in a classroom.
Your mum is so fat, when I was driving I had to swerve to avoid [her]. By the time I had finished, I had ran out of gas.
Your mama was so fat that she sunk the Titanic!
I bought myself the life-sized Jesus painting off of Amazon, and they had 4 nails within the pack. All I needed was 1.
I cut my dick. It is all right now, and half the size but makes for excellent breakfast.
Why are there 30 bullets in one clip?
Because that's the average classroom size.
Your mama's so fat that she's bigger than the Titanic.
Don't tell me I haven't got balls. I just happen to wear mine on my chest, and I can guarantee they're a lot bigger than yours!