Size jokes

Fatty told Skinny, "Do you have any food? My stomach is empty and I haven't eaten."

Skinny replied to Fatty, "Well, doesn't seem like you need food, you ate the whole universe instead!"

Your forehead is so big, you got an eight-head.

Your balls are so big, when people see you at the market, they think it's watermelon.

Your mum's so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing.

Why do American guns only have 30 rounds?

Because it's the average class size.

There are 10 million million million million million million million million particles in da universe that we can observe.

Yo mama took the ugly ones and put them into one nerd.

What do you call a white guy with a 10 inch cock?

Asleep. Because that motherfucker's dreaming.

Your forehead is so big it blocked my phone service!

Big feet equals mini meat.

Yo hairline is bigger than yo mama's booty.

"5 dollars if a fat guy can find his penis."

Yo mama is so fat that she stepped on the scale and it says, "Hey fat b****, break your fat a** in half so you won't weigh as much!"

Yo mama is so fat that she got on the scale, and it says, "Lose some pounds before you get on the scale, or it will break!"

Your friend is so fat, when he took the group pic, he was the background.

Your mama's so fat when she sat on the toilet, the toilet said, "A, B, C, D, E, F, G, get your fat ass off of me!"

Did you know the giraffe’s hooves are the size of dinner plates? Too bad they would have nothing to put on them!

Why do midgets giggle when they run?

Because the grass tickles their balls.

I tried phone sex once. But the holes were too small.

If you drop something, make your short friend get it.

Yo mama so fat, even Bob the Builder said, "We can't fix that!"