Newest Shut Up Jokes - Page 2

i was the person that flew into the twin towers, i have a 2 friends that are both twin and when ever they speak i tell them to shut up because if they don't ill make myself explode in them

One morning a dad was sitting and watching TV His daughter comes in and says "dad! Why is my name Rose?" He replied, "Oh! Its because when you were born a rose peddle fell on your head." "Cool" Rose said.

The second daughter walked in and said "dad! Why is my name Daisy?" He replied,"Oh! its because when you were a baby, a daisy peddle fell on your head." "Awesome" Daisy said.

The third daughter came in and said "DuUuUDeEeEeDrrrrrrrrr!!!" "SHUT UP CINDER BLOCK!!!"

jesus and satan are just basically homer and flanders. one tries to help the other, only for satan to just say "shut up".

This midget in my school has two moms I said did ur dad go get the milk he told me to shut up I said I don’t shut up I grow up like u should

Farmer walks into his bedroom with his wife in bed with a sheep under his arm says this is the pig I'm fucking she say u idiot that's a sheep he says shut up I wasn't talking to you

I dont shut up I grow up and when I see you I throw up.

Mommy mommy! Are we liars? Shut up and cross your fingers when you say that.

Mommy mommy! Are we dragons? Shut up and don’t breathe on the drapes.

Mommy mommy! Are you an archer? Shut up and keep the apple on your head still.

Mommy mommy! Are we Drug dealers? Shut up and cut the coke.

Mommy mommy! Do we own a sweatshop? Shut up and keep sewing.

Mommy mommy! Are we Janitor’s? Shut up and pass me the mop.

Mommy mommy! Are we Bank robbers? Shut up and pass me the note.

Mommy mommy! Are we Were-wolfs? Shut up and comb your face.

Mommy mommy! Are we Vampires? Shut up and drink your soup before it clots.

Mom shut up me I don't shut up I grow up when I look at you I throw up

There were 1 mom and 3 kids. The first kid comes up and asks why is my name daisy? The mom says because when you were born a daisy fell on your head. The second kid asks their mom why is my name butterfly? The mom says because when you were born a butterfly landed on your head. Then the third kid yells ahjoejienfkef. The mom says shut up brick!

I told an orphan two never stop talking until their parents come home

Now I can’t get it to shut up

A little girl said to her mom "MOM MY BUTTS CRACKED KISS IT KISS IT"her mom said "sweetie SHUT UP ITS ALWAYS BEEN THERE" then her daughter died cuz of her melodramaticness.